June 21, 2010

Today I dismissed the Order of Protection against Neil Zucconi

Well, my nightmare is over. I went to court today and dismissed the Order of Protection that I had filed on March 19, 2010, against Neil Zucconi because I was able to obtain what I feel is even better and much longer lasting protection for myself and my family than the Order of Protection provides. (You can find a lot more about this on my other blog, http://orderofprotectionsurvivor.blogspot.com) I dismissed the order in exchange for a stipulated addendum that is now attached to our decree of dissolution of marriage (divorce decree). This stipulated addendum contains provisions that include the fact that Neil Zucconi "shall not come into the State of Arizona for a period of one (1) year, ... and shall have no contact whatsoever with (me) by any means." So, no contact with me -- ever.

More on the legal saga can be found here on this public Maricopa County Superior Court web site.

I feel pretty good about this. It's "forever," whereas an Order of Protection is valid for only one year, at the end of which time, I would have had to go back to court to continue to have it upheld. One drawback to giving up my Order of Protection is the fact that it came with police enforceable protection. I don't have that now that the Order of Protection has been dismissed, however the stipulated addendum of the divorce decree is a fully enforceable order of the court....and if it is ever violated, I can easily go to court to get another Order of Protection.

While I was in court earlier today to take care of the Order of Protection dismissal, I listened to another woman who was there to obtain an Order of Protection of her own. Her story was so sad, as she recounted for the judge the physical abuse that she and her nine-year-old son had experienced at the hand of her boyfriend. And there were other women besides her who were waiting to see the judge to have their Orders of Protection filed as well. This must go on every hour of every day in every court across the country. It's crazy. Thank goodness we have legal protection in place for domestic violence victims such as the young woman who's testimony I heard, but how horrible that women have to resort to it.

This has definitely been an eye-opening and very jolting experience to go through, and if any of my blog readers would like to reach me or to know more about my story, feel free to leave a comment below.



15 comments:

Anonymous said...

How sad that you and your precious babies had to go through this. It's really awful and must be difficult to write about.
You are amazingly brave to come forward like this and I'm sure you will help women victims of abuse just like you've helped women who have suffered from ppd.
Keep up the good work and hang in there.

Anonymous said...

Ladies, Neil has moved from Murrieta to San Diego. In the Army and Federal Air Marshall based out of San Diego. Don't fall for those innocent looking blue eyes.

Kristin said...

Yes, I know exactly where Neil is living now in San Diego, and yes, I obviously did fall for those innocent looking blue eyes.... But I'm curious about your story. This is an anonymous venue, so please feel free to elaborate on your experience, or you can feel free to email me at kristinzucconi@gmail.com.

Warmest regards,
Kristin

Anonymous said...

I know him and he's big trouble. you don't want to get involved with him.

Kristin said...

To my most recent anonymous reader above, please feel free to elaborate on your story. I'd rather this space be constructive and not about defaming someone. If you have a compelling reason behind your statements, such as if you filed a restraining order against him in the past, that information would be helpful.

Kristin

Anonymous said...

I did not get a restraining order against him, but wanted to. He's controlling and possessive. A real asshole. But I don't want to get into it here. I have a daughter to protect.

Kristin said...

If you feel like sharing your story and want to take this offline, please feel free to contact me at kristinzucconi@gmail.com. Sometimes it's really good to vent. Believe me, you're not the first woman in his past and present life to contact me!

All the best,
Kristin

Anonymous said...

Amazing blog! Keep up the good entries.

Kristin said...

Thanks, Anonymous!! Glad you stopped by my blog.

Anonymous said...

thank you

Chris Tucker said...

Sometimes, restraining orders can work out to prevent domestic violence.
I am glad you had a happy outcome!

Kristin said...

Thank you, Chris! Yes, a restraining order definitely helped in my situation, as stressful as it was at the time. Life is definitely good now - it has been great to put it all behind me!!

casquette prada said...

i think it is a very good post!!!!

M.Johnathan R.H said...

As a former social worker, and a UMOM volunteer I've seen what real DV can cause. I too was raised in a DV home, but my mother never got help. My sister and I paid the price. While I understand the need and urgency to get help. False allegations hurt everyone too. I (along with my daughter) are the victim of false allegations. As a FATHER, I love my daughter more than I can explain. However, I NEVER caused any DV in our home, but that didn't stop her Mother from successfully obtaining an OOP against me, essentially keeping me and my daughter from each other. (In my opinion, out of spite.) Its a real shame that so many people actually HAVE suffered and someone like my childs mother can so easliy take advantage of the system to hurt and manipulate for her own gain.

Kristin said...

I really appreciate your comment. It's not often that I hear the perspective from someone who has had an order of protection filed against him. It sounds like you feel that your daughter's mother has taken advantage of the system, however as someone who has had to resort to filing an order of protection, I know very well that it is extremely difficult to file one successfully and then to have it validated in court. I can't imagine that someone could actually obtain one simply out of spite. The system isn't set up that way. There would have to be evidence of abuse or harassment in order to obtain an OOP, no matter what state you reside in.

I wish your family the best and hope that the issues are resolved in the best possible way for the sake of your daughter. At the end of the day, she is the most important person in the equation, and whether or not an OOP exists, she needs and deserves to be in a loving environment free from abuse of any kind.