PPD Survivor

Julia Burzon introduces her new blog, "Dear Diane"

2012-01-27T21:23:00.000-08:00

Julia Burzon was kind enough to stop by and let me know about her new blog, which covers a wealth of topics in relation to motherhood...mental health, religion, psychology and more. Julia's a stay-at-home mom of two and has been dealing with postpartum depression and anxiety for several years. She shares her experiences as well as resources that can help others in the same situation.

She also provides a listing of doctors (psychiatrists, pediatricians, etc.) that she recommends highly who are located in the Baltimore/Annapolis/DC metro area. You can find the list by clicking here.

Definitely a blog worth checking out!

Daily Hope for new moms struggling with PPD

2011-12-19T12:54:00.000-08:00

Katherine Stone, of Postpartum Progress, will soon be providing Daily Hope. Daily Hope is an inspirational e-message that Katherine sends out daily to her subscribers. The messages are not only inspirational and thought-provoking, they're beautiful as well and contain photographic images by British photographer Xanthe Berkeley.

Starting on January 10, subscribers can receive daily hope for only $5 per month and all proceeds go to the non-profit Postpartum Progress.

Daily Hope is an easy way for moms who are suffering from postpartum depression to receive encouragement and support on a daily basis, to help them feel like they're not alone. And the proceeds benefit a very worthy cause. Katherine Stone has been a super strong PPD advocate for many years, and has done amazing work to increase awareness throughout the country. You can find her website here.

'Warrior Moms' are speaking out

2011-10-14T15:46:00.000-07:00

There's a wonderful place online for moms to share their stories of dealing with postpartum depression. It's on the Postpartum Progress website, created by Katherine Stone, in a section called "Warrior Moms." I love that. We are truly warrior moms for having survived something as insidious and destructive as postpartum depression. And we've come out through the other side even stronger than we thought possible.

I'd encourage all new moms to visit this site and read these other moms' powerful stories. I was especially touched by Victoria's story. After having suffered PPD twice, she faced a third pregnancy with much courage and the strength of solid resources and support.

It's not easy to share such personal stories, especially when it comes to a condition that carries a social stigma such as postpartum depression. Not many new moms want to admit that their entrance into motherhood wasn't picture perfect or exactly what they'd expected. I'm proud of these "Warrior Moms" who have spoken out about their experiences in order to help spread awareness. It's only when we create and promote conversations about PPD that we'll finally be able to eradicate it through awareness and prevention.

Resources for Arizona Moms

2011-07-08T18:17:00.000-07:00

I want to share a wonderful listing of resources provided in the state of Arizona for moms suffering from postpartum depression. It can be found on the Arizona Midwives website by clicking here. Not only are there amazing organizations and support groups listed, there are contact names and website links that provide a tremendous amount of help in this realm. Even more helpful by making searching easy, the resources are listed by geographical area.

When I was suffering from postpartum depression back in 1996, not only was I completely unaware of what was wrong with me, I had no idea there were resources out there that could help. It's nice to know how far women's health advocacy efforts have come over the past 15 years, and how many wonderful groups and individuals there are who are ready to support new moms who in the past would have suffered in silence.

If you have questions about any of the resources listed here, or need different kind of help, please feel free to comment below.

Placentophagy....are you kidding me??

2011-02-25T20:08:00.000-08:00

I've written several posts here on placentophagy, or eating one's placenta, and I'm always amazed at the various resulting comments. OK, I know that there are people out there who strongly believe in the placenta's hormonal restorative qualities and all that, but come on....would you really want to eat a part of your body?

I was just reading an article on a moms' website about a new mom who ate her placenta because "it didn't seem right to merely throw it away."

I just don't get this placentophagy thing at all. So some assert that eating your placenta can help stave off postpartum depression. Personally, I think that resorting to eating a placenta would make me depressed. Yeah, I get that if you've experienced PPD before, you'd do just about anything to avoid having to endure it again. However, there are plenty of options out there other than eating a chunk of human body tissue. Options such as counseling, anti-depressants, support group therapy, yoga, exercise, acupuncture, and many more. No matter that Tom Cruise aparently prefers his placenta medium-rare, I would never even remotely begin to consider such an option.

Moms with postpartum depression apparently have reduced brain activity - one more thing to worry about

2010-09-29T21:56:00.000-07:00

I came across a recent article on psychcentral.com about a recently published study linking postpartum depression to diminished brain activity. The study, published in this month's edition of American Journal of Psychiatry, was done by the University of Pittsburgh School of Medicine and was partly funded by the National Institute of Mental Health and the National Alliance for Research on Schizophrenia and Depression (NARSAD).

Basically what the study says is that women suffering from postpartum depression may have reduced brain activity in certain regions of their brains that are involved in emotional processing. So, depressed moms are not as in tune with others' emotions, nor are they as responsive to emotional cues as they should be. When her baby cries, a mom with PPD may not react or respond as she would if she weren't depressed.

I don't know why this would be a surprise to anyone, and I'm not really sure the point of the study. The author of the article asserts that the study will benefit future treatment of PPD, but I'm not so sure about that. For one thing, only 30 mothers participated in the study - 14 who were determined to be "depressed," and 16 who were "healthy." This doesn't seem like a large enough population sample.

Another thing that bothers me about this study is that the focus seemed to be on the mom-baby attachment, and when you get into this sticky area, you run the risk of blaming moms for a lack of attachment. And you wonder what the real goal is. Treatment shouldn't be focused on improving the level of attachment a mom has for her baby. The goal of treatment should be getting the mom healthy and free from PPD. Mom-baby bonding is but one of many aspects that will improve as she recovers and breaks free from PPD.

We need to focus more on avoiding PPD to begin with instead of treating just one of the issues connected with the disorder.

Actress Sadie Frost Opens Up About Her Postpartum Depression in New Memoir

2010-08-17T21:26:00.000-07:00

Sadie Frost's memoir, "Crazy Days," will hit stores next month, so sneak peeks of the book are starting to hit the wires. The memoir delves into Frost's experience with postpartum depression over several years during her marriage to actor Jude Law.

Sadly, Frost experienced PPD twice, following the births of her second and third children. Not only did she suffer a breakdown and at one point had to stay in a psychiatric ward, her disorder was apparently the cause for the unraveling of her marriage. One night she actually slashed her arm with a pair of scissors. Her description of how emotionally detached and empty she felt while cutting herself is creepy, but sadly familiar to many women who have suffered from PPD.

The Daily Mail recently came out with a lengthy article that includes an excerpt from Frost's memoir, and I believe that much of her story will ring true with any woman who has suffered from a postpartum mood disorder.

The article closes with these pearls of wisdom from Frost: "I've realised, as a woman and a mother, that depression is not something we like to admit to. The stigma remains: as a mother you are supposed to cope and not admit defeat. What saved me was being able to ask for help and to accept it. It was the best thing to do because as soon as I did, recovery was swift.

To come through and out the other end, into the light, you have to experience pain. Yes, there are moments of loneliness but I now have a routine and rhythm to my life that I didn't have before.

Every morning I wake with my four children. We have at least seven cups of tea during the day and at night we have cups of cocoa and cuddles. Glamorous it ain't, but it's real life, and I'm happy."

The good news is that Frost survived her ordeal and it sounds like she's the better for it, with four children and, now, a healthy and happy life.

Arizona Postpartum Wellness Coalition Makes Big Strides in Improving the Postpartum Experience for Arizona's Families

2010-08-03T17:49:00.000-07:00

One of my favorite non-profit organizations dedicated to postpartum wellness is the Arizona Postpartum Wellness Coalition (APWC). The APWC is comprised of a group of amazing volunteers around the state of Arizona who focus primarily on providing education opportunities on perinatal mood disorders as well as much-needed community resources. APWC volunteers put on workshops, facilitate postpartum depression support groups, and provide a toll-free warmline.

The APWC was recently awarded a significant grant from Jenny's Light that will enable the organization to provide free educational presentations on postpartum mood disorders (in English and in Spanish) throughout Arizona, in addition to covering the cost for thousands of new brochures. This is endeavor is called "Operation Education," and the APWC is currently looking for volunteers as well as locations in Arizona to host the educational presentations.

The APWC also has a need for volunteer or low-cost web design help. If there are any web designers out there who have been touched in some way by postpartum depression and would like to volunteer their services for this truly worthwhile organization, please contact chibbert@postpartumcouples.com.

Perfectionist moms at greater risk for postpartum depression

2010-07-08T21:42:00.000-07:00

An article came out yesterday on LiveScience.com reporting on a recent study that suggests perfectionism can put a new mom at risk for postpartum depression. I don't necessarily find this surprising. When I was a new mom, naturally I wanted everything to be perfect, and I totally bought into the Hallmark image of a glowing postpartum where I appeared blissful with my precious new bundles of joy while my pregnancy weight miraculously melted away.

Of course, things were far from perfect after my first pregnancy and I had absolutely no sense of control over anything that was happening. I had one baby barely hanging on in NICU, premature by three months and weighing only two pounds, and had to bury his twin brother a few days after their birth. On top of everything, only four months into my postpartum, I was stunned to find myself pregnant again.

So this article cites the study and states that: The link between perfectionism and postpartum depression was strongest amongst those who try to deal with perfectionism by appearing as if they don't have a problem.

I'm certain that I buried my depression while I was pregnant the second time around because I was terrified that the pregnancy would end up like the first. And I imagine I was still in shock from the horrible way my first pregnancy had turned out. I don't know that I was necessarily trying to deal with my perfectionism by appearing as if I wasn't suffering -- I think I was merely trying to survive an unbearable situation.

In any case, I think it's easy for new moms to fall into the perfectionism trap. Because it is definitely a trap. I've never known a mom who had it all together right after giving birth. Maybe there are some perfect moms out there, but I have yet to meet one. (Thank goodness, or that would seriously be reason to get depressed....) ;)

I think this study is interesting, although not rocket science. It would probably be worthy of being included in the "what to expect" handouts that OB's give out to prepare first-time moms. To check out the article, you can click here.

Breastfeeding Mom Thrown Into Jail Over a Restraining Order

2010-07-05T15:04:00.000-07:00

I blogged about this earlier on my other blog, and I think it's relevant here as well.

Amy Shroff, a young mom in Denver, Colorado, went to her local police station because she's terrified of her ex-husband, who was following her in his truck at the time. She ran into the station with her restraining order in her hands and let a police officer know that her ex was in violation of the order because he continues to contact her. The police officer mistakenly believed that the ex was the one who filed the restraining order against her (?!?), so he throws her into jail for the night. How crazy is that?

Never mind that she's in jail for no good reason, separated from her baby and unable to breastfeed. The police officer, Frank Spellman, apparently didn't care, even when she pleaded with him to let her go home to feed her baby. The baby ended up being fed formula and became ill as a result.

In the end, the City of Denver now has to pay Shroff $175,000 for her wrongful arrest. Which, in my opinion, is way too little.

So when you have this kind of situation, where you're a victim of domestic violence, afraid of your baby's father and dealing with a crazy system where you can actually get arrested when all you want is protection, ... how do you avoid depression? Her postpartum cannot have been a cake walk with the issues and abuse she has faced from her ex. It makes me depressed simply reading this woman's story as it's spread across the wires the past few days.

You can read one version of her story by clicking here.

Ever since I started my Order of Protection Survivor blog, I'm hearing about new moms who are dealing with issues of abuse that can only serve to exacerbate postpartum-related stress. I honestly don't know how these women get through such devastating issues while juggling the demands of a newborn.

Susan Dowd Stone on EmpowHER: screening for postpartum mood disorders is a good thing!

2010-06-28T21:12:00.000-07:00

On the EmpowHER web site, award-winning therapist and nationally renowned postpartum depression expert Susan Dowd Stone recently wrote an article about the concept of mandated screening for postpartum mood disorders. You can click here to find the article.

In the article, Stone addresses the misconceptions that have been floating around, (mainly due to a backlash of reactions to the MOTHERS ACT legislation), on screening that is offered to new moms. There have been plenty of rumors that women will be forced to be screened for postpartum depression and other postpartum mood disorders, however that is simply not the case.

What I don't understand about all of this is why some women are turning this into a big issue. What are they afraid of? Screening is a great thing, and any health care facilities that offer screening for postpartum mood disorders should be applauded. Women are certainly not going to be forced into screening if they're not interested.

If there had been screening back in 1996, when I went through my own postpartum depression hell, then maybe I wouldn't have experienced PPD in the first place. Any preventative measure like postpartum mood disorder screening can only be helpful to a lot of women and their families.

If you're interested in finding more of Susan Dowd Stone's work, you can visit her web site at: http://www.perinatalpro.com.

Moving on and having hope

2010-06-24T10:55:00.000-07:00

Before I get started with this latest PPD post, I'd just like to thank everyone who has offered support during the past few nightmarish months of breaking free from my ex-husband, Neil Zucconi. Our 10-month marriage (which was definitely 10 months too long) taught me many things, and one of the biggest things I've learned is how many truly amazing friends I have. I didn't know what a crucial support system Facebook could be, and I'm so grateful for everyone's constant and supportive comments, phone calls, hugs, and prayers.

Okay, so ... I'm moving on. :)

I'm totally back to the topic of postpartum depression after my little hiatus...

And, what I'm posting about today seems very fitting. I'd like to bring attention to a blog post on Katherine Stone's Postpartum Progress blog, not only because it's extremely well written and touching, but also because it's written by her husband -- a man who truly "gets" what PPD is all about and has been right there in the thick of it, supporting his wife through all of the ins and outs of PPD over the years as she evolved from a woman who suffered from the disorder to one who advocates for others. He was right there alongside Katherine and all of the other strong women who spoke out and worked hard to ensure that the MOTHERS ACT was passed. And what a tremendous victory that was.

As I try to move forward and get my life back, it really helps to read such a wonderful post by a husband who is reaching out to encourage women who are suffering from PPD that there is hope.

That message of hope is good for all of us.

Today I dismissed the Order of Protection against Neil Zucconi

2010-06-21T18:32:00.000-07:00

Well, my nightmare is over. I went to court today and dismissed the Order of Protection that I had filed on March 19, 2010, against Neil Zucconi because I was able to obtain what I feel is even better and much longer lasting protection for myself and my family than the Order of Protection provides. (You can find a lot more about this on my other blog, http://orderofprotectionsurvivor.blogspot.com) I dismissed the order in exchange for a stipulated addendum that is now attached to our decree of dissolution of marriage (divorce decree). This stipulated addendum contains provisions that include the fact that Neil Zucconi "shall not come into the State of Arizona for a period of one (1) year, ... and shall have no contact whatsoever with (me) by any means." So, no contact with me -- ever.

More on the legal saga can be found here on this public Maricopa County Superior Court web site.

I feel pretty good about this. It's "forever," whereas an Order of Protection is valid for only one year, at the end of which time, I would have had to go back to court to continue to have it upheld. One drawback to giving up my Order of Protection is the fact that it came with police enforceable protection. I don't have that now that the Order of Protection has been dismissed, however the stipulated addendum of the divorce decree is a fully enforceable order of the court....and if it is ever violated, I can easily go to court to get another Order of Protection.

While I was in court earlier today to take care of the Order of Protection dismissal, I listened to another woman who was there to obtain an Order of Protection of her own. Her story was so sad, as she recounted for the judge the physical abuse that she and her nine-year-old son had experienced at the hand of her boyfriend. And there were other women besides her who were waiting to see the judge to have their Orders of Protection filed as well. This must go on every hour of every day in every court across the country. It's crazy. Thank goodness we have legal protection in place for domestic violence victims such as the young woman who's testimony I heard, but how horrible that women have to resort to it.

This has definitely been an eye-opening and very jolting experience to go through, and if any of my blog readers would like to reach me or to know more about my story, feel free to leave a comment below.

How do you deal with the trauma of an order of protection?

2010-06-12T21:48:00.000-07:00

Yes, I'm still taking a brief break from my PPD posts here and posting on my current ordeal instead....

But, before I delve more into my stuff, it just occurred to me that it must be an absolute nightmare to be a new mom AND to deal with the devastation of a traumatic divorce. I can't imagine juggling the demands of a newborn while coping with the fear, shock and craziness that comes with divorce. And what if you have to deal with filing a restraining order against your spouse or significant other at the same time? I can't even begin to imagine.

It's difficult enough wading through the court system while trying to find people who can help advocate for you. I've been extremely fortunate to have found an incredible local resource that I never knew existed until I was forced to call upon the police one horrible night this past February. That incident triggered a phone call with the Victim Services Program at my local police department where I discovered amazing advocates (both paid and volunteer staff) who are incredibly knowledgeable and supportive.

These dedicated Victim Services advocates are amazing and heroic in their efforts on behalf of women who are suffering, and who need legal guidance as well as police assistance. I will forever be grateful to Betsy, one of the advocates there who not only held my hand throughout the traumatic Order of Protection filing process, but she also successfully tracked down my ex-husband, Neil Zucconi, in California to have him served with the Order of Protection.

But even with that tremendous support, I have often felt very alone throughout this time. Not because I don't have amazing, caring friends and family supporting me, but because I really don't know others who have gone through this. I never imagined this would happen to me. I never even imagined that I'd ever have to call 911. This wasn't supposed to be part of my life.

But then again, whoever expects this stuff to happen. Things like postpartum depression, cancer, losing your job, death of a loved one, domestic violence, ... you name it. Something devastating can seep insidiously into your life with little or no warning, and there you are. I guess it's all about how you cope....

You can find a lot more about this part of my life on my other blog, http://orderofprotectionsurvivor.blogspot.com.

Fighting the Devastating Impact of Mental Anguish

2010-05-25T21:34:00.000-07:00

I'm still deep in this post divorce abyss. Yes, I know I'm still off-topic here on my PPD blog, but I don't want to not post anything at all while I'm in this horrible place. I have a feeling I'll be here for a while. And I really need to have a voice during this time. But honestly, PPD is not the foremost topic on my mind right now. Right now, it's all about survival and getting through this in one piece.

I do feel that a lot of what I'm experiencing mentally and emotionally correlates to many of the repercussions I experienced fourteen years ago when I suffered so terribly from postpartum depression. I can't sleep -- I'm fighting all kinds of swirling emotions -- but most of all I'm just so sad.

I can't believe my marriage to Neil Zucconi ended up the way it did. And I can't believe that I had to call the local police on February 5 to have him removed from my home. Until the police officers who showed up that awful night advised me to file an Order of Protection, I had absolutely no idea what one was or how to file for one. This whole ordeal has been quite an education. And one I didn't think I'd ever have to learn.

Hopefully soon I'll have the peace of mind to get back to my PPD posting and advocacy work. But for now, please bear with me as I come back up for air. And if anyone reading this has anything they'd like to share on this topic, please feel free.

Dealing with Divorce and a Restraining Order

2010-05-03T10:45:00.001-07:00

Unfortunately I haven't posted here in a while due to personal reasons. Although not related to postpartum depression, my present situation is just as devastating on a mental and emotional level, and I'm guessing there are plenty of women who can relate, so I'll share what's going on with me right now....

I just recently divorced and it has been extremely traumatic. My marriage to Neil Zucconi was quite brief; after about 10 months I filed for divorce. And shortly after that, on March 19, 2010, I filed an Order of Protection (restraining order) with the Superior Court in Phoenix, and he was subsequently served on April 30. One challenging aspect of this has been the fact that Neil is in law enforcement, as an air marshal with TSA. The amount of mental anguish and emotional stress and general fear that I've been dealing with in filing this restraining order has overwhelmed me. (You can find a lot more about this on my other blog, http://orderofprotectionsurvivor.blogspot.com.)

I'm in the process of reaching out to others who are dealing with or who have dealt with filing a restraining order against a spouse or significant other. I'm also looking for divorce support groups and other resources that might help as I head towards recovery. I know it's going to be a long haul. I think that to some extent, I'm still in shock about what has happened. I didn't see this coming at all. It actually reminds me a lot of the many months back in 1996 when I was on the road to recovery from postpartum depression. Once again, I'm dealing with feelings of shock, helplessness, fear, anger, sadness, and of course, a big blow to my self esteem.

This is definitely not easy.

Mt. Holyoke Alumnae Quarterly publishes Postpartum Depression: A Silent Epidemic

2010-01-27T00:46:00.000-08:00

Another postpartum health advocate, blogger and professional writer, Ivy Shih Leung, teamed up with me to produce a PPD article that has just been published in the latest edition of the Mt. Holyoke College Alumnae Quarterly magazine.

We're very proud of this piece since much sweat and tears went into unearthing the many emotions that we still harbor even after all of the years that have gone by since our experiences with PPD.

My own experience with PPD so greatly shaped my foray into motherhood and still lingers with me to this day, propelling me towards advocacy and education with the hope that I can help other women avoid this life-changing disorder.

To check out the online version of our article, you can click here. I am grateful to the editorial board of the Quarterly for giving us the amount of attention and space that this issue so deserves.

Check out Dr. Shoshana Bennett's PPD Video Series on EmpowHer

2009-12-17T23:21:00.000-08:00

I have another video to share of a remarkable woman who has made tremendous strides in spreading awareness of PPD while treating and helping women who have it. Dr. Shoshana Bennett is the past president of Postpartum Support International as well as founder of Postpartum Assistance for Mothers. Also a renowned author and speaker in the realm of postpartum depression, Shoshana has devoted much of her adult life to educating new moms on the symptoms of PPD and how to be empowered to overcome them. In fact, she is a survivor of two life-threatening, undiagnosed instances of postpartum depression herself, which makes her a total expert in my book, even with her amazing credentials.

To view a video series of Shoshana discussing various aspects of PPD in short clips, click here. You can also see her work on her wonderful and informative web site.

NAMCs Circle of Caring PPD Support Groups

2009-11-23T10:04:00.000-08:00

I came upon the National Association of Mothers' Centers (NAMC) while on Facebook and want to help spread word of the fantastic work they do in the postpartum depression realm. One of the association's main missions is to educate moms and their families about PPD while reaching out to them with support. Based in New York, NAMC collaborates with the Postpartum Resource Center of NY to provide peer-led support groups to help empower women who are experiencing PPD.

The women who lead these support groups are trained as facilitators and volunteer their time to help other women. These "Circle of Caring" groups are in two locations in New York state at this time, however NAMC hopes to expand this service to other cities around the U.S. I believe that groups like these are incredibly important and are so very needed by women who are suffering from the symptoms of PPD and need to feel that they're not alone.

To learn more about the NAMC's program or to provide support, you can contact Lisa Kaplan-Miller at lisak@motherscenter.org or (516) 939-6667, x106.

Besides their postpartum depression outreach, NAMC provides other excellent resources for moms through their 30+ centers that are located throughout the U.S. The association works at both the grassroots and national level and is definitely worth checking out.

My friend Michelle shares her PPD story in an awesome video interview

2009-10-30T11:35:00.000-07:00

There's a great video interview of a friend of mine, Michelle, who has been an extraordinary PPD advocate here in Arizona. Please check out her story by clicking here. This interview took place in Tucson over a year ago while Michelle and I, along with other women's health advocates, were attending a women's mental health symposium at the University of Arizona. This interview was just posted on EmpowHer and is part of an excellent series of PPD videos spotlighting several women's stories.

PPD support on Twitter!

2009-09-01T23:08:00.000-07:00

For all of you tweeters out there, Twitter Moms has a PPD support group going that's pretty interesting. It doesn't seem super active, but there are about 30 great moms in the group who are hitting some important PPD topics.

While there, you can listen to a podcast by Dr. Heather, who calls herself the "babyshrink." You can also enter a discussion forum and contribute to topics such as "When did you realize it was PPD?" There is venting going on as well as sharing. But, most importantly, moms can easily connect to other moms who are dealing with a postpartum mood disorder by simply clicking on their photo.

Nurse Practitioner Schools names top 50 PPD blogs, including this one!

2009-08-18T13:24:00.000-07:00

The Nurse Practitioner Schools web site has a listing of the top 50 postpartum depression support blogs, sites and online communities that are out there on the web. It's a very comprehensive listing, including not only this blog, but also some really stellar blogs by women who have become women's health advocates after experiencing their own bout of PPD.

Of course, some of my absolute favorites are on the list, such as Dr. Shoshana Bennett's Postpartum Depression Recovery blog, Susan Dowd Stone's PerinatalPro blog and my friend Ivy's PPD blog.

It's well worth it to check out the list in its entirety. It's organized by type, so whether you're looking for a PPD blog written by a mom or one written by a professional or a blog that's geared solely for dads, you can find whatever you need here. There are some truly amazing stories of hope within these sites, as well as fantastic resources.

Check out "The Healthy Woman" in local bookstores now

2009-07-23T22:30:00.000-07:00

The U.S. Department of Health & Human Services Office on Women's Health has put together a very helpful book that empowers women to have easy access to basic information on just about every health category. The Healthy Woman; A Complete Guide for All Ages can be found in bookstores around the country, including Barnes & Noble and Borders, as well as directly from the U.S. Government Bookstore.

Not to pat my own back, but I was a contributor to the book within the Mental Health chapter. I was asked to share my PPD story, which I did gladly and with the hope that it might reach other moms out there who are searching for information.

The book also includes a tremendous list of resources, from non-profit health organizations to providers. You can even find treatment options for various conditions and where to find the help you need when something is wrong. But the most powerful sections in the book are the personal stories, where women share their health experiences. A California woman wrote of her experience suffering from numbness in her hand and "heaviness" in her chest, and being diagnosed with acid reflux. It turned out that what she really had was premature heart disease and, shockingly, within just hours of her correct diagnosis she underwent open-heart surgery. I loved her following quote, which of course would apply to any health condition that a woman is dealing with: "We must make ourselves our number one cause and, as with me, be given another chance at life."

Watch Shoshana Bennett's PPD videos on EmpowHer

2009-06-09T20:43:00.000-07:00

This is a must-see ... Dr. Shoshana Bennett, past president of Postpartum Support International and a past president of California's state organization Postpartum Health Alliance, speaks out on PPD in a video series on EmpowHer.

One of the videos that I believe is a powerful topic to explore is whether or not PPD can go away by itself. One study that Dr. Shosh quotes showed that 25% of women who had PPD were still deeply depressed one year out.

I'm wondering if this statistic might be low. Or if there are a lot more women (besides the 25% who are deeply depressed), who are just ever so slightly or even mildly depressed and remain so for a long, long time. And then become a lot more depressed over time until chronic depression sets in.

All I know is that I've known plenty of mothers who are obviously depressed, even many years after their kids are born. They might overeat or chain smoke or drink a little too much from time to time, or do other things to take the edge off. But deep down they're depressed. And their depression could have very well started as PPD and then left untreated to fester over time. I wonder how many women who end up being prescribed anti-depressants in their mid-life, when their kids are well into elementary school and beyond, are actually suffering from PPD.....

How do you reach a non-believer?

2009-05-17T16:01:00.000-07:00

I was on a mom's web site last night and was astounded when I read a post from a woman who says she doesn't believe that postpartum depression exists. And yet she has been suffering from various ailments for the past 3 months, including weight gain, major lethargy, headaches that don't seem to go away, sadness and frustration. Oh, and did I mention she has a 3-month-old baby? If she doesn't believe in PPD, then just what does she attribute all those yucky symptoms to?? She also mentioned that the women who say they have PPD are just wimps who need to get a grip and focus on their baby instead of themselves. Nice.

So how do you reach women who don't believe in PPD?? I did post a comment in her conversation thread....how could I not? I tried to let her know just how real PPD is, and barraged her with links to web sites such as PSI's, Susan Dowd Stone, and other PPD resources. I also mentioned that mental disorders like PPD can be more insidious than your average disease because they are invisible. But try to tell someone with Autism that it's not real just because you can't see it. I hope she checked out at least one of the resources I listed. I hope she gets help. It's tragic to think of someone suffering from PPD when it's so easily treatable.

MUST READ: A dad shares his story of losing his daughter to PPD

2009-04-15T16:07:00.000-07:00

Susan Dowd Stone recently posted the following incredibly touching story on EmpowHer. It's from a dad, Joseph S. Raso, who lost his daughter to postpartum depression. He asked Susan to post or share his story wherever she felt it could help others. I'm helping to share it as well.....

The Best Meal of My Life

I experienced the best meal of my life the other day. That’s saying a lot from a man who is just shy of 60, and has spent his entire life in the restaurant business. Since my 6th birthday, when my parents opened up La Bella’s, a little mom and pop Italian restaurant, I have had the opportunity to travel and enjoy delicious meals prepared by some the world’s finest chefs.

Even after my wife left, and I was faced the prospect of raising two energetic children on peanut butter & jelly sandwiches and Hamburger Helper, I never lost my appetite for fine dining.

In the early 90’s I met my current wife Mary, a beautiful single mom of two. Her parents had passed, so I asked her eldest teenage daughter, Crystal, for permission to take her mom to dinner. It’s funny - looking back now, I can’t tell you what Mary was wearing, but the restaurant was a perfect combination of cozy atmosphere and scrumptious food.

As 2000 rolled around, our kids now grown, Mary and I discovered cruise ships. We realized, if we carefully picked our departure dates, we could cruise for about $200.00 a day with the all important, MEALS INCLUDED!

On a cruise ship, nothing surpasses the experience of a savory dinner of two hours, your meal prepared by top chefs, while enjoying an unhurried conversation with your spouse. A brochure on one of our cruises informed us that, for an extra $25.00, we could have the “Ultimate Dining Experience”. We could not believe our meals could get any tastier but we gave it a try. Words cannot explain the evening. The service was impeccable and the food was to die for. Gazing at Mary across the table with the moon rising behind her made my diner all the more unforgettable.

We have been on about ten cruises now and I never thought we could top those culinary delights, until the other day, when I experienced the best meal of my life.

Crystal, the oldest of our four children, was always the more serious. She was the one to whom we entrusted our most important papers and house keys when we left town. Crystal gave birth to Hannah in 2003 and baby Max in 2007. When Max was born, things just seemed to bother Crystal more. She seemed to worry about everything. We tried to reassure her, but that was Crystal, the worrier.

On Feb 25, 2008, we got together with her and her husband, Chris, for lunch. Everything seemed fine. On Feb 27, 2008 at 11:45 AM, Mary received a call from the police concerning a family emergency at Crystal’s house. As we raced the few blocks to her house, I feared the worse. Did baby Max, not yet four months old, die from Sudden Infant Death Syndrome? I begged: God please let Max be OK!

As we rounded the corner and their house came into view, there were police cars in the streets and driveway. A detective who was polite, but uninformative, stopped Mary and I from entering the house. As I turned back to the street, I noticed Chris holding baby Max. Knowing that Hannah was in school, I asked him what was going on. With a dazed look in his eyes he told us that Crystal had shot and killed herself.

She had seemed unusually worried the past few days, always fussing about Max, unable to get a good night’s sleep. Attempting to breast feed as long as possible, she was concerned that her milk was drying up. We didn’t notice the symptoms of what we later learned was, Postpartum Depression. We just thought that was Crystal, always worrying.

Over a year has now passed. We have all pulled together and gotten into the routine of helping Chris raise Hannah, his precocious first grade daughter, and Max, a handsome boy of sixteen months. I have volunteered to give Max his 06:00 AM feeding five days a week. This occupied my time and kept my mind off of Crystal. Mary would come over at 07:15 and get Hannah ready for school. In the morning commotion, Chris would wolf down some cereal, and if the kids were up, give them a kiss, and out the door he’d go, grateful for us being there.

It is amazing how we live assumptive lives. Every day, we assume our family will always be there. It’s not that we have taken them for granted it is just that no one ever expects to outlive their own child. I now appreciate the little things in life more. I love Max’s happy giggle every morning as I sing to him while changing his diaper. The joy experienced viewing Hannah’s beautiful sleepy face, when she rolls out of bed is unexplainable.

Mary and I took all four grand kids to a matinee the other day. After the movie, we stopped at Target to get them a snack. “We want the Kids $2.00 Hot Dog & Soda Special,” they yelled. Mary and I sat at a table across from them. As we ate, we enjoyed the view of our grandkids just being kids. I savored every second of hearing them laugh and watching them play as I finished my salad and hot dog. It was the best meal of my life.

Joseph and his family ask that you support The Melanie Blocker Stokes MOTHERS Act. To do so, please go to www.perinatalpro.com.

Kudos to organizations behind the Melanie Blocker Stokes MOTHERS ACT!!!

2009-03-13T10:30:00.000-07:00

More on the Melanie Blocker Stokes MOTHERS ACT......

I think it's interesting to know who the sponsors of the bill are. I'd like to send many kudos to these wonderful organizations who "get it" and see the need for postpartum depression legislation. The leaders of these organizations are doing what they can to help bring moms with PPD out of the darkness of their depression and isolation, to make sure they receive the care and support they need so their needless suffering can end.

Here they are:

Postpartum Support International
Association of Women’s Health, Obstetric and Neonatal Nurses
American Psychological Association
American Psychiatric Association
Children’s Defense Fund
American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists
March of Dimes
Mental Health America
American College of Nurse Midwives
National Council for Community Behavioral Healthcare
Depression and Bipolar Support Alliance
Suicide Prevention Action Network USA
National Alliance on Mental Illness
Association of Maternal and Child Health Programs
National Partnership for Women & Families
OWL- The Voice of Midlife and Older Women
National Women’s Law Center

Support the Melanie Blocker Stokes MOTHERS Act by signing online petition - it's EASY!

2009-03-12T12:58:00.000-07:00

I've written about the Melanie Blocker Stokes MOTHERS Act quite a bit on this blog, and I've recently heard that an online petition is being circulated now to garner support for this wonderful bill that will have such a positive impact on new moms and in the realm of perinatal mood disorders in general. I want to spread awareness of this online petition and encourage anyone reading this to sign it. It's so easy. I just signed up to have a letter sent via email to my local legislator.

All you need to do is go here: http://capwiz.com/ndmda/issues/alert/?alertid=12832296

You'll want to scroll down to the bottom of the page where it says "take action now" and enter your zip code. It couldn't be easier!

Meet Ivy Shih Leung - PPD Writer Extraordinaire!

2009-02-06T08:49:00.000-08:00

I've had the pleasure to get to know Ivy Shih Leung, a new writer on the scene who is tackling PPD in a big way. Ivy's wrapping up a book that she started writing shortly after suffering from PPD following the birth of her precious daughter. And she just started a new blog where you can learn more on PPD statistics while reading her touching prose. Here's an excerpt from her latest post:

"Fueled by the passion to help other women, angered by public remarks like 'There is no such thing as a chemical imbalance,' and determined to help stamp out the ignorance about PPD, I set out 5 months after my daughter was born and 2 months into my recovery to start writing my book and get the message out that those remarks couldn’t be further from the truth. Determined to learn more about this misunderstood, under-diagnosed and undertreated illness, I joined Postpartum Support International (PSI) in 2006 and attended annual conferences to network with and pick up the latest information from subject matter experts. I also attended two PSI fundraisers in my old hometown of N. Caldwell, NJ, which was hosted by Sylvia Lasalandra, author of 'A Daughter’s Touch' and attended by Senator Robert Menendez, Governor Jon Corzine, former NJ First Lady Mary Jo Codey (PPD survivor), Senator Richard Codey, and Dr. Manny Alvarez of Fox News, among many others. I plan to participate in the Sounds of Silence second annual run/walk fundraising event on May 9^th on Long Island.

Having PPD at a time when mothers are “supposed to feel nothing but absolute bliss”-one of the “motherhood myths” I touch on in my book-is so embarrassing and difficult to talk about, that most women will not tell their stories to people they know, let alone to the world. There’s this fear of being judged, criticized and labeled as crazy and, worse yet, unfit mothers.

Well, I am not afraid to tell my story, especially if it means helping other mothers. I want to make a positive impact by empowering women with knowledge about an illness that is more prevalent than people think. One out of eight mothers (that’s a rate of 20%) suffer from PPD. And I’m not talking about the baby blues, either. Approximately 80% of mothers experience what is referred to as baby blues-the tendency to be teary/emotional due to the huge hormonal changes that occur with childbirth-within the first couple of weeks postpartum and resolves on its own."

Please check out Ivy's blog for the rest of her story, as well as additional info on PPD.

Susan Dowd Stone shares hopeful thoughts on the Melanie Blocker Stokes MOTHERS ACT

2009-01-15T11:02:00.000-08:00

Susan Dowd Stone submitted the following article to EmpowHer yesterday and I want to help spread this info around because it's so crucial that this much-needed legislation gets passed. Please read below and click here to find out more about Susan and the tremendous work she is doing.

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Attention advocates of America’s mothers and the thousands of courageous women who are experiencing or who have survived a pregnancy or postpartum depression – you have not been forgotten. For among the significant challenges facing the 111th Congress, the issue of untreated maternal depression remains a top priority. One new Congressional focus is the rebuilding of national infrastructure. One might make the analogy that this should include enhancing the healthy infrastructure of our families by ending the preventable plague of maternal mood disorders which continues to ravage over 800,000 women – and their infants and families – every year. The long-term consequences of untreated maternal depression range from chronic illness, child learning disabilities, family stress and economic loss - to death.

Congressman Bobby L. Rush has reintroduced The Melanie Blocker Stokes MOTHERS Act to the 111th Congress. During the 110th Congress, the legislation had over 130 bi-partisan cosponsors and passed the United States House of Representatives on October 15th, 2007 by a vote of 382-3. I was so very proud to be sitting in the Congressional Gallery on that triumphant day as a unified Congress validated the suffering of millions of American women and families by promising more support to help end this public health crisis. Congressman Rush never forgot the Chicago constituent – Melanie Blocker Stokes – who lost her life to this illness and whose tragic death inspired his decades long devotion to end maternal suffering.

In the U.S. Senate, Sen. Robert Menendez has been similarly steadfast in his devotion and promotion of The MOTHERS Act. Initially based on New Jersey’s groundbreaking law inspired by PPD Survivor and former New Jersey First Lady Mary Jo Codey and spearheaded to passage by her husband N.J. State Senate President Richard Codey, the passage of this legislation has resulted in increased availability of services, public awareness campaigns and state-wide hot lines responsive to the crisis. While repeated attempts by Sen. Menendez and other senate leaders to pass the bill last fall narrowly missed, one pivotal result was that the national spotlight again became fixed on this incomprehensible Congressional stalemate.

The resulting new waves of national attention and support for this bill and its clear, purposeful mission have further galvanized public support and public outcry for its passage. The research, education, public awareness campaigns and grants for treatment and supportive services requested in The Melanie Blocker Stokes MOTHERS Act will help to end the untold agony that too often goes unrecognized, undiagnosed and untreated.

The countless women who walk through my practice door feeling shamed and marginalized for the medical illness they are trying to fight alone must know that these common disorders can afflict anyone - that these illness are treatable - that they did nothing to cause it - that they will be well again! That they are NOT ALONE!

As president-elect Barack Obama - one of the bill’s initial lead sponsors – takes the nation’s helm this week, we anticipate a timely convergence of forces which will lend impetus to the bill’s passage this year.

In addition to our legislative leaders, many thanks to all of you who have given voice and time and energy to turn this tide on the ignorance and suffering that has plagued American mothers and their families for decades – your moment is coming. With your renewed support and advocacy, we will pass The Melanie Blocker Stokes MOTHERS Act in 2009!

SUMMARY OF THE LEGISLATION Section 1: Short title of the bill- The Melanie Blocker Stokes MOTHERS Act.

TITLE I- Research

• Encourages HHS to coordinate and continue research to expand the understanding of the causes of, and find treatments for, postpartum conditions. Also, encourages a National Public Awareness Campaign, to be administered by HHS, to increase awareness and knowledge of postpartum depression and psychosis.

• Sense of Congress that the Director of the NIH may conduct a nationally representative longitudinal study of the relative mental health consequences for women of resolving a pregnancy (intended or unintended) in various ways, including carrying the pregnancy to term and parenting the child, carrying the pregnancy to term and placing the child for adoption, miscarriage, and having an abortion. This study may assess the incidence, timing, magnitude, and duration of the immediate and long-term mental health consequences (positive and negative) of these pregnancy outcomes.

TITLE II- Delivery of Services

• Encourages HHS to make grants available for projects for the establishment, operation, and coordination of systems for the delivery of essential services to individuals with postpartum depression. (Entities): Makes grants available to public or nonprofit private entity, which may include a State or local government, a public-private partnership, a recipient of a grant under the Healthy Start program, a public or nonprofit private hospital, community-based organization, hospice, ambulatory care facility, community health center, migrant health center, public housing primary care center, or homeless health center, or any other appropriate public or nonprofit private entity. o (Activities): Eligible activities include delivering or enhancing outpatient, inpatient and home-based health and support services, including case management and comprehensive treatment services for individuals with or at risk for postpartum conditions. Activities may also include providing education about postpartum conditions to new mothers and their families, including symptoms, methods of coping with the illness, and treatment resources, in order to promote earlier diagnosis and treatment.

TITLE III- General Provisions

• (Funding): Authorizes $3,000,000 for fiscal year 2008; and such sums as may be necessary for fiscal years 2009 and 2010.

• (HHS Report): Requires the Secretary of HHS to conduct a study on the benefits of screening for postpartum depression and postpartum psychosis.

• (Limitation): The Secretary may not utilize amounts made available under this Act to carry out activities or programs that are duplicative of activities or programs that are currently being carried out through the Dept of HHS.

SUPPORTERS: Postpartum Support International Association of Women's Health, Obstetric and Neonatal Nurses American Psychological Association American Psychiatric Association Children’s Defense Fund American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists March of Dimes Mental Health America American College of Nurse Midwives National Council for Community Behavioral Healthcare Depression and Bipolar Support Alliance Suicide Prevention Action Network USA National Alliance on Mental Illness Association of Maternal and Child Health Programs National Partnership for Women & Families OWL- The Voice of Midlife and Older Women National Women’s Law Center

Time got away from me

2008-12-18T12:34:00.000-08:00

I know it has been forever since my last blog post. And it's not because I've not been in touch with the latest PPD-related news and issues. It's just that life has been way too full and way too fast these days.....

So in the last month, my mom remarried (to a wonderful man who I just adore), the company where I work, EmpowHer, went out of beta and launched a fabulous new version of the site, and I've been dealing with my first holiday season post-divorce. At the moment, I'm contemplating what it will be like to be alone on Christmas day. (I had the kids with me over Thanksgiving.) But I'm not too overly worried about it because if Christmas Day is anything like the rest of the year that has gone by so fast and furious, it will be a fleeting memory before I know it. My New Year's resolution is to get back on track with my blog here and to stay focused on reaching out to women who need the best information and resources on postpartum depression.

Mother in Florida kills her three young sons and herself

2008-11-01T11:13:00.000-07:00

My initial thought when reading the headline of this story was how tired I am of seeing these stories, over and over. I felt this welling of frustration in my stomach. Once again, more babies lives are destroyed, yet again, another mom takes her life ... because we still have so much work to do to spread awareness of postpartum depression and its horrible life-threatening sister disorder, postpartum psychosis. And authorities in Floral City, Florida, where this latest incident took place, are all scratching their heads, wondering why this young mother killed her babies and then herself. Makes me want to scream.

Jenny's Light shines bright in the PPD world

2008-10-27T16:55:00.000-07:00

I've just come upon a truly beautiful web site dedicated to an extraordinary young woman, Jennifer Gibbs Bankston, who became very ill with a perinatal mood disorder, and subsequently took her baby boy's life and then her own. I cried as I read through the site and saw the photos of Jenny and her gorgeous son Graham. I applaud the tremendous efforts of her family and friends who have created Jenny's Light and are reaching out to help prevent other moms and families from going through a similar, horrendous ordeal. Please visit www.jennyslight.org.

Pregnant on Prozac, Dr. Shoshana Bennett's latest book and a must-read!!!

2008-10-01T16:36:00.000-07:00

I'm thrilled to announce a new book, "Pregnant on Prozac" by Dr. Shoshana Bennett, nationally renowned Postpartum Depression expert and past president of Postpartum Support International. This new ground-breaking book will be released in January, 2009, and I personally can't wait to see it on book store shelves around the country.

I've written more than one post here on the issue of taking anti-depressants while pregnant and breastfeeding, and found out quickly that not only is it extremely controversial, but there are so many unanswered questions that continue to surround this issue. And moms, as well as experts, end up lining up on opposite sides as we try to muddle through the confusion.

Well, now, thanks to Shoshana, there's finally a book that cuts through the fog and answers integral questions such as: Does the media exaggerate risks? What of options such as tapering the dose? Most importantly, this book empowers each woman with the knowledge to make THE BEST decision for her and her family. "Pregnant on Prozac" is for any prospective mother who has experienced depression or anxiety as well as anyone with a friend or loved one in this situation. It's the first guide to separate the myths from the facts, and clearly spells out not only the possible risks of anti-depressant use (whether it be Prozac, Wellbutrin, or any of the other drugs), but also the lesser-known yet serious risks to both fetus and mother from untreated depression. In the book, Shoshana also discusses natural treatment methods, which I believe is so very helpful and important, and haven't seen elsewhere.

The only problem now is waiting till January to scoop copies of this book off the shelves to give to every obstetrician and pregnant woman I know.....

Get to know the wonderful Stephanie Morales!

2008-09-05T10:47:00.000-07:00

Stephanie Morales recently got in touch with me via EmpowHer, and I want to spread word of her wonderful work. Stephanie is a licensed marriage and family therapist in private practice in Torrance, California. In addition to her extensive involvement in the women's health arena in Los Angeles, Stephanie also makes time to volunteer as a Southern California Co-Coordinator for Postpartum Support International (PSI). She is currently coordinating PSI's national resource list for their Spanish Warmline. This warmline is an awesome resource, providing much needed Spanish-language PPD support through a toll-free number, at 1-800-944-4PPD (press 1 for Spanish).

Many, many kudos to Stephanie for her incredible dedication to helping women with PPD while spreading awareness in both English and Spanish. If you have any resources that you'd like to share with Stephanie and her team at the Spanish Warmline, please contact her at: StephanieMoralesMFT@hotmail.com. And check out her beautiful web site!

New postpartum depression scale may be effective in screening new moms

2008-09-02T13:21:00.000-07:00

Researchers in Denver just announced that simply by asking three simple questions, doctors can tell whether or not a new mom may be suffering from postpartum depression. This new three question screening process is basically a sub-scale of the traditional Edinburgh Postpartum Depression Scale that is commonly used. Instead of asking a boat load of questions to a new mom who is most likely completely sleep-deprived, stressed, distracted and has an attention span of a toddler, this new scale contains only these three yes/no questions:

1) I have blamed myself unnecessarily when things went wrong.

2) I have felt scared or panicky for not very good reason.

3) I have been anxious or worried for not very good reason.

Apparently, in the study, this shorter PPD depression scale identified 16% more mothers as being depressed than the longer, Edinburgh questionnaire.

Personally, I see merit in the study and am so glad that PPD is receiving this kind of attention to detail. However, had I taken the above test, I would not have been diagnosed, as my symptoms were all physical (mainly GI-related) and I had no idea that I felt anxious or scared or panicky. I just wondered why I couldn't stop vomiting or feeling nauseous or dizzy all the time.

Much still needs to be done to educate our medical providers on just what the symptoms of depression are and how to more effectively reach those who are have so deeply fallen into a dark place that they are unable to seek help.

To read a complete article on the study, please visit EmpowHer, the world's greatest health site for women!

Kare Anderson, Moving From Me to We

2008-08-30T14:09:00.000-07:00

Kare Anderson was so kind to read my Atlanta Mom post and then to take the time to leave a really nice comment. Here's what she wrote:

"Thank you for your bravery in sharing, your making so many people around you a part of your solution so they were 'touched' by the experience and thus may be more aware of others who are facing the same darkness. I also admire your spotlighting the other mother in Atlanta."

Then Kare added the following: "Remember the many compartments of the heart, the seed of what is possible. So much of who we are is defined by the places we hold for each other. For it is not our ingenuity that sets us apart, but our capacity for love, the possibility our way will be lit by grace. Our hearts prism, chiseling out the colors of pure light."

How beautiful. I'll have to find out if it is an original Kare quote or if it came from somewhere else. How true it is that our capacity for love does truly set us apart. Love has been on my mind lately, so Kare's timing couldn't have been better...

So I checked out her blog and so appreciate her mission of shedding much-needed light on the ways to successfully engage with others, even in this crazy texting-emailing-facebook-youtube-linkedin-twittering world that we live in.

Bring it on, Kare. Great job!

The Yellow Wallpaper: Chicago Danztheatre Ensemble performs Charlotte Perkins Gilman's famous story

2008-08-18T13:15:00.000-07:00

I'm fascinated that a dance company is going to perform an adaptation of Charlotte Perkins Gilman's "The Yellow Wallpaper." This is one of my favorite books of all time for several reasons. For one, it was written in 1891 by an amazingly strong woman who had suffered from postpartum depression. It was in 1887 when she was suffering, when her doctor advised her to go home and live "as domestic a life as far as possible" and to "never touch a pen, brush or pencil" as long as she lived. Nevermind that she was a writer. So Charlotte obeyed her doctor's instructions and nearly went completely insane. At the "borderline of utter mental ruin," Charlotte thankfully picked up a pen at the encouragement of a friend and wrote "The Yellow Wallpaper." She then sent a copy of the book to the good doctor, who naturally never acknowledged it.

So this book has always meant a lot to me, not just due to the subject matter, but also because my cousin Whitney gave it to me when I'd just started recovering from my PPD experience. Whitney told me that I was in good company, and that actually felt really, really good, knowing that there was an amazingly brilliant and strong woman over a century ago who'd gone through the same ordeal.

So check out this link to the Chicago Danztheatre Ensemble's info and photo. See the woman laying on the floor? Looks a lot like me about 12 years ago....

If you happen to be in or near Chicago when the performance is slated, please go see it. I wish I could!! I think it's awesome that the Chicago Danztheatre Ensemble is helping to spread the word about PPD, not to mention honoring a great book by an amazing woman.

Performances of The Yellow Wallpaper:

October 3-5, and October 10-12, 2008

Runs Fridays & Saturdays at 8 p.m., & Sundays at 7 p.m.

Gorilla Tango Theatre, 1919 N. Milwaukee, Chicago, IL 60647 Street parking available, CTA accessible - Blue line Western/ #49 Western, #73 Armitage and #56 Milwaukee busses

Handicapped accessible

Call for tickets: 773-598-4549

$15 general admission

2 for 1 tickets students & industry

Group discounts for 8 or more - call 773-486-8261

The 6th Annual Postpartum Depression 5K Walk/Run in Charleston, SC is coming up in September

2008-07-22T16:47:00.000-07:00

The Ruth Rhoden Craven Foundation for Postpartum Depression Awareness is holding its 6th Annual Postpartum Depression 5K Walk/Run at 8:00 am on Saturday, September 13th, in Hampton Park, located in Charleston, South Carolina.

Even though September may sound like a ways off, it will be here before we know it, and online registration for this wonderful event has already started.

Helena Bradford established the foundation in honor of her daughter, Ruth Rhoden Craven, who suffered horribly from PPD. Here's a bit about Ruth from the foundation's web site:

"Ruth Craven was a beloved daughter, wife, mother, and friend who suffered from postpartum depression following the birth of her first child. This illness took a stable, positive, and happy young woman and turned her into a weakened, helpless, lost soul. On December 5, 1999, two and a half months after the birth of her son, Ruth could take the pain and anguish of PPD no more and ended her life."

Ruth's mom, Helena, is an absolutely incredible woman. I've had the honor of getting to know her via phone and email, and think the world of what she is doing to help spread awareness of PPD in her daughter's memory. Please consider taking part in her foundation's 5K fundraiser, or simply make a tax deductible donation to take part in spreading PPD awareness and education through this wonderful foundation.

PPD Hope offers a hotline available 24/7!

2008-07-04T21:55:00.000-07:00

For women who are suffering from postpartum depression and need help now, there is a great hotline that I found at PPD Hope. The number is: (877) PPD-HOPE, or (877) 773-4673. I called it myself late last night just to check it out and make sure that a live person answers. Sure enough, a woman answered the line and confirmed that a live person answers 24 hours every day. You have options to receive free literature on PPD and/or get in touch with their peer support program.

The PPD Hope web site also offers a PPD screening test that you can take on the site so you can quickly and easily find out if you might need medical assistance or counseling.

I think this is a fabulous resource, so I want to help spread the word. PPD Hope was created by the Family Mental Health Institute (FMHI), a non-profit based in Washington, DC. The FMHI is working to make postpartum depression screening a universal standard of care across the U.S. Federal legislation is in the works, however currently this issue is left in the hands of individual states. Hopefully one day in the near future, every new mom will be screened for PPD before she leaves the hospital with her new baby.

What the ----? Does anyone out there get placentophagy?? I sure don't!

2008-06-30T16:12:00.000-07:00

It's been many, many moons ago since I first posted on placentophagy, and oddly enough, I'm still getting comments on that original post. And I'm still completely bewildered. I simply just don't get how a person can eat a body part. And I know there are those out there who firmly believe that the placenta has hormonal nourishing properties, and that the hormones produced by the placenta during gestation are actually still "living" after the birth (yeah, right), and that they will magically stave off Postpartum Depression, ... but I gotta tell ya that it just doesn't make sense scientifically, and represents, quite honestly, that "magic pill" that so many women are searching for when it comes to PPD. I'm sorry, but there's no magic pill cure. And certainly not in your placenta.

So I just got a comment on my placentophagy post from a husband in the UK who actually has a video showing him cooking up and eating his wife's placenta. And he actually looks and sounds like a normal guy. Go figure. You've got to check it out at the above link. But don't expect to be hungry for a long while afterwards....

Katherine Stone starts bookstore challenge!

2008-06-22T22:32:00.000-07:00

My friend and fellow PPD health advocate Katherine Stone has started a bookstore challenge in response to the dearth of books on PPD in many bookstores. It's not that there aren't plenty of wonderful books and other resources on postpartum depression, it's that many bookstores don't feel that it's an important enough topic to devote a space on a shelf too. Sad but true. So Katherine has started a running list of bookstores that have failed big time to carry books on PPD. Please feel free to join her in her quest to educate booksellers on the importance of this topic.

Insurance company wants to push meds on depressed woman due to cost effectiveness

2008-05-17T22:42:00.000-07:00

A mental health provider was kind enough to leave the below comment on my blog. I found it so unsettling that I want to put it front and center as a post. I personally feel that this mental health provider is an absolute hero for standing up for her patient the way she did. If only every woman with depression or PPD had a patient advocate like her!!! Please read and let me know what you think. (I just wish I knew what insurance company this was.....)

Anonymous said:
I am a mental health provider and very interested in the topic of postpartum depression/perinatal mood disorders - I have two children and struggled w/ postpartum anxiety after my first child.

This topic struck me today specifically because I "had it out" with an insurance company and their "clinical review counselor" today....

I have a client who is a 35-year-old woman who is moderately depressed, and trying to get pregnant. She is responding nicely to psychotherapy and wishes not to start medications because of her desire to become pregnant, and I support this as do her physicians. The "clinical review counselor" from her insurance company disagreed with me because meds would make her treatment progress faster and therefore cost the insurance company less -- he cited this new literature that you cite here in your blog -- I hadn't read it yet but told him that it was ridiculous to medicate someone who is responding to psychotherapy and who wants to become pregnant just to speed things up. It's not worth the risk, no matter how small. His only response was that it was afterall the patient's decision.

What annoys me is that if I were not one to advocate for my clients or one who was up on the research, I may have been swayed by this and felt pressured to lead the patient in that direction. In this case, I totally feel like I won though, especially when he asked me for the expected length of treatment; I said "6 months and if she gets pregnant she'll need to be monitored throughout the pregnancy and the postpartum period because her risk of postpartum depression is increased." He said "ok" -- NEVER do they say "ok." Their job is to limit benefits to save money - he clearly had no clue about perinatal mood disorders.

Susan Dowd Stone comments on the Melanie Blocker Stokes MOTHERS Act

2008-05-12T13:09:00.000-07:00

I know I've written before on The Melanie Blocker Stokes MOTHERS Act that is now before the US Senate, but really, there can't be enough said about this all-important legislation.

Susan Dowd Stone, President of Postpartum Support International, provided the below statement about the bill. She brilliantly covers the important aspects of the bill and why we desperately need it to be passed. Please feel free to comment or offer questions about the bill and I will get them to her to respond to you.

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While we await positive action from our nation’s legislators on The Melanie Blocker Stokes MOTHERS Act , questions arise. Some have wondered why we need a federal bill in place when we have so many well known organizations and individuals devoted to ending the ignorance of pregnancy related mood disorders. Hasn’t this issue received enough attention these past three years? With all the media, famous advocates and well respected leaders speaking out, the growing science and research substantiating the seriousness of untreated maternal depression – aren’t we done? Aren’t many thousands more people now aware of postpartum depression, thanks to the CBS Cares public service campaign, news stories on every major and local network, the power of the blogosphere, conferences, state’s responses and organizations like PSI, EmpowHer and many others? And aren’t there now more services and treatment options available as mothers face what is often the fight of their life?

NO. We are barely beyond the starting line.

It’s true we now have two states out of 50 with legislation on the books strongly encouraging screening, education for consumers and healthcare providers and services for new mothers. Many other states are in the process of developing programs thanks to the tireless efforts of grassroots organizations and advocates who have decided that lives will not be lost on their watch by the devastation of untreated maternal depression. But their sustainability is uncertain and often depends on the generosity of donors and foundations besieged with requests for funding. We now have one or maybe two hospitals in the whole country where women can seek treatment with their infants and avoid the damaging and often unnecessary separations when intense services are required.

We need a federal response because research and education .. not geography... should determine what services will be consistently available to all American mothers. And that is exactly the goal that The Melanie Blocker Stokes MOTHERS Act (TMBSMA) intends to initiate.

There is nothing in TMBSMA that suggests mandates for anything.. no conspiracy to medicate moms, take away children - its modest request for funding streamlines the focus of its initiatives - READ THE SUMMARY and see for yourself. This truly bipartisan effort is about research education and provision of services for long suffering moms who have not had such access in the past and disgracefully still don't. Currently only 15% of afflicted mothers will ever receive any treatment.

Treatment can take many forms including social support, consumer education, better nutrition and self care, therapy, and sometimes medication. No choice should ever be discouraged - each women's experience is as unique as her life, and her recovery plan should reflect all available options! To cast aspersions or imply weakness when medication is warranted for recovery is like telling a diabetic woman she should be ashamed of taking her insulin.

We routinely screen - without any public outcry - for many other pregnancy related conditions whose incidence is less than the up to 20% of mothers (that's 800,000 without counting women who miscarry or whose babies are stillborn) who may develop a serious mood disorder this year!

There is a long list of other illnesses - including breast cancer - which appear less frequently among American women, but which generate appropriate and unquestioned societal, legislative and healthcare response. But we do not consistently and routinely ask the right questions of pregnant and postpartum women. The difference is the stigma of mental illness.

Research continues to point to early brain development in the neonate as exquisitely sensitive to its environment – an environment whose quality largely depends on the health and abilities of its mother. In no other illness is the fate and future health of one innocent so closely tied to the present health and abilities of another. So we can pretty much double the number of those directly affected by pregnancy related mood disorders without argument. The statistics of those afflicated will continue to rise in numbers completely disproportionate to our abysmal response.
Perhaps when further research on long term societal, family and psychological effects finally translates into economic loss, this destroyer of our motherhood's expected joy will finally receive the attention needed to end truly needless suffering. The irony is that here's one condition where PRIMARY PREVENTION, i.e. methods to reduce the incidence and effects...is entirely possible. By our avoidance and refusal to implement a national, prosocial and adequate response we pay many times over for such ignorance... and those who pay the most are our most vulnerable citizens.

One can only incredulously wonder why on earth there would be any objection to federal encouragement and support for the research, education and services needed to end the loss of lives and incalculable suffering. Federal support means everyone is on notice to get up to speed. Federal support means the services are available to the many, not just the few. And federal support and acknowledgement means the beginning of the end of stigma.

The reality of maternal mental illness is a fact which cannot be challenged. The battle could go on another ten years depending on our demands of our elected officials to end a public health crisis. But while constituents remain inert about taking action, while we split hairs over definitions,form camps about what treatment is best, allow our legislators to politicize the problem and take aim at each other instead of the issue, suffering is prolonged for those too ill to participate in the calls for help.

Bills are passed for new roads while mothers experience unfathomable despair. Bills are passed for bicycle helmets while the partners of such mothers initiate a desperate search for help. Bills are passed for mortgage relief and campaign finance reform while babies cry alone.

Women are the majority of voters and our children are held up as the future of our country yet we are often silent for ourselves and our children - unused to the direct solicitation of our opinion as one that deeply matters and which can shape future policy. We are often too quickly grateful for any consideration received instead of demanding what is truly needed. The transformative magnificence of the internet is that it offers busy mothers and those who love them - a path to power, an internet megaphone, a virtual march on Washington, and the facilitation of unity despite the distracted isolation of daily demands.

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Here is a summary of the bill. Please check it out and let everyone you know about this important legislation that we need to work together to make sure it's passed.

Atlanta Mom asks me about how to prevent postpartum depression

2008-05-06T15:22:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I heard from Atlanta Mom who also blogs about her PPD experience and tries to reach out to help new moms. She asked me how I overcame PPD with my subsequent pregnancy. Even though I've written about how I prevented experiencing PPD a second time, it's been a while, so I want to share what I wrote back to her.

Here's an excerpt from my e-mail to her:

I was determined not to go through PPD again at all costs, and began researching ways to avoid it. I came upwith a list of options/resources and spent much of the pregnancy planning on what I wanted my postpartum tobe like.

One thing I did was to hire a postpartum doula. That was absolutely the best money that I've ever spent!

I also enlisted my neighbors and close friends to help -- I told them my PPD story, if I hadn't already shared it with them, and asked if they would help with different areas that they felt like they could help with (ie: preparing meals, having my two older kids over for play dates, going to the grocery store for me, etc.). I got my friends to commit to certain things, and they were so happy to help out -- they were awesome. (It's so hard to ask for help,but once you do, you find that your close friends are so relieved to know what they can do that will truly help you.)

I also hired a neighborhood teenager to come over to my house nearly every afternoon just for a couple of hours or so toplay actively with my older kids, to give them really solid attention. My husband saved up his vacation time andwas able to take a full 3 weeks off after the birth, and he was great around the house and supervising everything.

I also started on an anti-depressant within minutes after giving birth, and also had a psychologist on call in case I experienced any PPD symptoms so that I could quickly get in to see her or have a phone consultation if I needed it.

So, basically I was very focused on creating a really strong support system, not only helping me with just about everything but also helping me monitor any PPD symptoms should they arise. Happily, I never even experienced a single symptom!! It was a wonderful postpartum and I was relatively rested even after having had a C-section. The doula helped me immensely with getting the baby on a schedule while juggling my older kids. I only needed her help for the first three weeks. I stayed on the anti-depressant for about 9 months or so just to make sure I was doing okay, and then I gradually weaned off of it and did great. PPD is totally preventable. That's my big message. The big thing is overcoming the fear of going through it again, facing that fear and then preparing/educating yourself on how to avoid it. Everyone should be able to experience a happy postpartum!!

Toll-free warm line offers Spanish language PPD support!

2008-05-06T15:10:00.000-07:00

Well, I haven't had much luck in my quest to find PPD resources for new, single moms, but I did find this helpful bit of info.....

Postpartum Support International offers Spanish-language support on its toll-free warmline, at 1-800-944-4PPD (press 1 for Spanish).

I think this is an incredibly helpful resource. I do believe that there are many hispanic women suffering not only from PPD, but also from the stigma of PPD, due to cultural and language barriers. I applaud PSI for offering this very important resource!

Andrea Zas Jimenez is the support coordinator for the Spanish Warmline, and Stephanie Morales will be coordinating PSI's national resource list for Spanish-speaking support.

Please help spread the word about this resource for Spanish-speaking new moms who may need PPD information and help.

Now that I'm a single mom, I wonder what kind of help exists for single moms with PPD

2008-04-19T22:38:00.000-07:00

I wasn't single back in the days when I had my babies, and fortunately had a very supportive husband who helped me when I suffered through PPD and later helped me avoid suffering through it again. Now that I'm single and writing this PPD blog, I can only wonder what happens to all of the new single moms out there who are faced with PPD....

I did some searching on the web to find out what resources exist that are geared specifically to single moms. I didn't come up with a whole lot. Sure, there are several large web sites devoted to single moms, such as singlemoms.com, but I had a heck of a time finding solid PPD info, support groups for single moms, etc. I don't know -- maybe others might have better luck.

In any case, I'll continue doing research in this area. I know well from experience how different things can be for single moms, and I can't even begin to fathom what it would be like to to be on your own with a new baby and have PPD. I hope to find some good resources to list on this blog that might be helpful to single moms out there. In the meantime, if anyone has info to share, please let me know!

Why are we fighting against each other over a bill that will save lives??

2008-03-26T22:15:00.000-07:00

I continue to be amazed at the backlash that has generated in response to the much-needed, ground-breaking Mother's Act that is currently before the US Senate. Apparently just a handful of women are behind this backlash, however they're raising quite a stink. And they appear not to have actually read the bill. Rather, they obviously have their own agenda regarding SSRI's and thus have twisted the actual intent of the bill to fuel their agenda.

So let's back up...... It has taken 7 years for this piece of legislation to get to where it is today. Here is a synopsis of what the bill is really about, taken from the Postpartum Support International web site:

"H.R. 20 prioritizes research and treatment of postpartum depression and psychosis by expanding and intensifying research through the National Institutes of Health and the National Institutes of Mental Health on the causes, diagnoses and treatments of postpartum depression and postpartum psychosis.
H.R. 20 also encourages the National Institutes of Health to work in partnership with local communities to coordinate and broadcast heightened public service awareness about postpartum depression and its symptoms. H.R. 20 further provides grants to groups that have a track record of working with women who suffer from postpartum depression and postpartum psychosis."

A comment on the bill by U.S. Rep. Bobby L. Rush: "Because of the failure of our nation's health system to effectively address the medical ramifications of postpartum depression and psychosis, I will continue to urge my colleagues in the House and Senate to join me, Melanie's mom and millions of concerned families throughout the country to ensure enactment of this legislation," Chairman Rush said.

If the group of women who are attempting to sabotage this bill were to actually read it, they'd find that it's not about "pushing pills." It's not "big pharma" taking over and making sure that every new mom is diagnosed with PPD so they can be prescribed SSRI's. That's a bunch of crap.

It's about spreading awareness of PPD, to the public as well as to the medical community. It's about education -- every new mom who leaves the hospital will be armed with information about PPD. It's about actually helping new moms who are suffering from a postpartum mood disorder and who are now left either misdiagnosed or undiagnosed. It's also about educating the medical community on how to look for signs of postpartum depression in their patients and to make sure they get the help they need, whether that's talk therapy, an anti-depressant, a support group, a postpartum doula, etc.

I nearly lost my life to postpartum depression after the birth of my third baby and I know firsthand what it's like to be misdiagnosed and left untreated. The doctor who failed to diagnose my PPD literally threw up his hands in front of me and told me to "go home and be a mother to my babies." I wouldn't wish this kind of mistreatment for any other woman, and yet it's happening to new moms out there EVERY SINGLE DAY. It's about time a bill like this gets passed so that we can not only increase awareness of this insidious, and yet easily treatable disorder, but also save lives. Anyone who is speaking out against this bill because of an issue with anti-depressants/pharma clearly doesn't understand its purpose.

I believe that we can all agree that when something works to bring a PPD/PPP sufferer back from the abyss, we should all be grateful, whether that "something" is yoga, a support group, a loving mother-in-law, a helpful neighbor who cooks dinners, a postpartum doula, acupuncture, prayer, music therapy, a supportive husband, a help-line counselor, meditation, a sugar pill, an SSRI, massage therapy, chanting, whatever.... For me personally, a combination of talk therapy, prozac and yoga saved my life. For some others, this would not work. All brains are different, with very different chemistry make-ups.

Regardless, I believe it's time we stop casting judgments. We should pull together as women who care about other women, to bring an end to the needless suffering of those with perinatal mood disorders. Let's focus on the positive and stop bickering about a bill that will do a lot of good.

Scientific American's solid article on postpartum depression epidemic

2008-03-21T11:43:00.001-07:00

There's an extremely comprehensive article on PPD on the Scientific American web site, including data from a number of current PPD-related studies from around the world. The article, written by Katja Gaschler, includes an in-depth look at the impact of PPD on the nascent bond between a mother and her baby.

Here's an excerpt:
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"The consequences of depression inevitably reach beyond the mother. In a fog of sadness, a mother often lacks the emotional energy to relate appropriately to her baby. Overwhelming grief prevents her from properly perceiving a child’s smiles, cries, gestures and other attempts to communicate with her. Getting no response from mom, the child quits trying to relate to her. Thus, three-month-old infants of depressed mothers look at their mothers less often and show fewer signs of positive emotion than do babies of mentally healthy moms.

"In fact, infants of depressed mothers display something akin to learned helplessness, a phenomenon University of Pennsylvania psychologist Martin E. P. Seligman and his colleagues described in the 1960s. In Seligman’s experiments, an animal would conclude that a situation was hopeless after repeatedly failing to overcome it—and then remain passive even when it could effect change. A similar passivity characterizes depression. “Sometimes the infants mirror their mother’s depressive behavior,” Reck says.

"Such reciprocal withdrawal can start to fray the critical emotional bond between mother and child, especially if the depression occurs early in the baby’s life. Other work has shown that infants develop essential social skills in months two through six, building relationships with their mothers as well as other people. In a 2006 study of 101 new mothers, psychiatrist Eva Moehler, Reck and their Heidelberg colleagues found that maternal depression strongly diminished the quality of a mother’s bond with her child at two weeks, six weeks and four months postpartum—but not at 14 months. Thus, depression during the first few months after birth may be particularly perilous for a child’s social development."
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So .... in addition to treating a woman for PPD, it's equally important to treat the relationship that she has with her baby as well. Apparently, there are some really ground-breaking therapies happening around the world, such as at the Clinic for General Psychiatry in Heidelberg, Germany. This personally fills me with so much hope. How great to know about the good work being done out there!! Here's another excerpt:

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"Tabea, a mother in her early thirties whose depression was severe enough to warrant hospitalization for several weeks after she gave birth, is still having difficulty interacting with her four-month-old son. At the Heidelberg clinic, a psychologist asks Tabea (which is not her real name) to sit in front of a video camera with her baby. Tabea speaks loudly to him. She raises her eyebrows and laughs. Her infant makes eye contact, and a smile flits across his face. His mother feels reinforced. But then the infant turns his head away. And Tabea says, “Well, what’s the matter now? Sulking again, are we? Did mommy leave you by yourself too long?” Tabea feels guilty for having had to leave her baby to be treated for depression.

"But it is normal for infants to turn away after a social interaction. That is how they regulate stimuli. It is not, as Tabea sees it, a personal affront or a sign that she is a bad mother. Nevertheless, Tabea’s misinterpretation of her baby’s actions can prompt a vicious cycle in which the child’s apparent rejection hurts Tabea, making her feel insecure and sad, which in turn has a negative effect on the baby.

"The therapist’s job is to break that cycle, largely by correcting a mother’s misimpressions and emphasizing what she has done well. Tabea’s wide-open eyes, for example, signaled that she was paying attention to her child. The psychologist points out that Tabea’s expressive face and melodious speech are similarly appropriate and helpful. Then she encourages Tabea to wait for her child to take the initiative, which will be her signal to respond.

"Some hospitals have mother-infant treatment centers for postpartum depression so that the mother can remain with her infant during treatment. There hospital personnel help the mother feed, diaper and bathe her child while also providing behavior therapy. Fathers can play an important part, too. Assuming he is not depressed, a father can significantly ameliorate the effects of a mother’s depression by building a close relationship with his son or daughter.

"Meanwhile a mother can take steps to ease her emotional burden by asking for help from family and friends, sleeping more, spending time with her spouse, getting out of the house and putting less pressure on herself. In the end, most mothers who receive adequate treatment—often a combination of psychotherapy, medication and self-help—usually recover completely within about two months of starting treatment, according to psychiatrist Ricardo J. Fernandez of Princeton Family Care Associates in New Jersey. Some mothers even emerge from their cloud of sadness with a new sense of clarity. As one mother said of her depression, 'It gave me the impetus to change my life.'"
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I just love that last quote. I can totally relate to that "new sense of clarity" feeling that comes from rising up from the pit of despair. There is actually so much positive that you can take away from overcoming a devastating nightmare such as PPD. And it's gratifying to know that there are those in the scientific community who are working hard to contribute to what has truly become an epidemic among mothers.

The Andrea Yates case and the insanity defense

2008-03-19T11:54:00.000-07:00

Andrea Yates' case was an especially gripping one for me personally because of the timing of it. I gave birth to my fourth baby on June 18, 2001 (see my beautiful baby in the photo to the top right giving me a big smooch). She was born just two days before Andrea Yates killed her five children. Having barely survived PPD with my third baby, and knowing well the grim statistics of having it reoccur, I was slightly nervous, to put it mildly, that I would experience it again. Being bombarded with the Yates’ case on the news shortly after giving birth didn’t help my nerves to say the least…

Anyway, during that time, I was furious at the ignorance of the media on the subject of postpartum psychosis, or rather postpartum insanity. Every reporter who covered the story said she had postpartum depression, which is a completely different disorder from postpartum psychosis. I felt that this ignorance seeped its way into the Texas court system. Or perhaps it was already there to begin with. Regardless, no one, including the judges, seemed to understand the psychosis that she had to have experienced to have done what she did. Her case should have been an easy one for insanity defense. Insanely easy. However, the Texas court system has this crazy insanity standard that even Andrea Yates' illness was no match for. Unbelievably, she was found sane and locked up.

However just last week her conviction was thrown out (six years later!) and she will have a new trial. A great article was recently posted by Jonathan Turley of the LA Times about this as well as the various and weirdly conflicting (let's just call them insane!) insanity laws we have scattered around the country. It's an interesting read. But even more interesting will be how the Yates case ends up after all of these years and how Texas will come to terms with it.

Story of a mom who survived PPD

2008-03-16T21:57:00.000-07:00

There's an article that ran recently in The Santa Clarita Valley Signal that I think everyone should read about a mom named Tracy who went through PPD and successfully came out the other side.

Here's an excerpt that I especially found valuable:

Prevention is Key
Since screening for depression is rarely done on pregnant women, knowing your own risk factors and taking care of yourself both before and after your baby is born are key ingredients to avoiding PPD in the first place.

"It's a shame that we screen pregnant women for Down's Syndrome, but we don't screen for depression, even though it's much more common," said Diana Barnes, Psy.D., a licensed marriage and family therapist specializing in the assessment and treatment of postpartum illness.

Those at higher risk of developing PPD include women with a personal or family history of PPD or other mood disorders, as well as those who have significant mood changes around their menstrual cycle, and women undergoing fertility treatment.

"If you had one episode of PPD already, the risk of having a subsequent episode during a different pregnancy is 75 percent," Barnes warned. "If you have been treated for depression or anxiety in the past, you are at risk."

Barnes added that if you develop depression while you are still pregnant, like Tracy did, your risk is even higher of being depressed after the baby is born as well.

Though many women have these risk factors, Barnes cautions against panic. Just because you are at risk does not mean you will develop PPD, but being aware of the possibility means that if you do develop it, you will be able to nip it in the bud that much sooner.

"Awareness is key," said Barnes. "Women should educate themselves and their families during their pregnancy."Barnes also encourages women to slow the pace of their lives before and after a baby is born. Don't try to change houses, jobs, or make other major life changes.

"Try to keep things status quo for at least one year postpartum," she said. "Women often put too much stress on themselves around pregnancy time, which is not good. We underestimate how big a change we are going through, and overestimate what we can handle. Other cultures make a much more sacred space for women to be pregnant, and we don't, but we should."

Get Help and SupportTo help yourself get well if you are in the throes of PPD, experts advise that you not be afraid to ask for help, and accept as much as you can.

Since getting enough sleep is important for recovery, Barnes suggests bringing someone in to your home who can get up at night with the baby if necessary. Tracy chose to hire a nanny, but you can also call on your spouse, a friend, or a family member as well.

In addition, finding other mothers suffering from PPD or a support group that caters to women with PPD can be a lifesaver during the most difficult moments.

"Support groups are excellent," Barnes said. "When you have PPD you feel that no one could feel as bad as you, but when you are sitting across the room from someone who gets what you are going through, there is nothing as good as that. You have less of a sense of isolation, and it can make you feel more hopeful."

Barnes recommends finding a group that specifically deals with mothers with PPD, as opposed to a general "new mothers" club, since moms with PPD are going through an entirely different experience of motherhood than those not suffering from it.

Mixing PPD and expectations of postpartum body image -- read the GET REAL BARBIE list here!

2008-02-23T12:39:00.000-08:00

So I read in the paper this morning that J.Lo just gave birth to twins yesterday and next to the article was a photo of her (obviously taken before her pregnancy), with the caption stating that she's already starting to get back into shape. P-LEEEAASE....

This bit about J.Lo, not to mention all the other stories on celebrity moms instantly getting their pre-pregnancy bodies back that we're barraged with in the media, makes me think of how we moms are up against an uphill battle. Especially when we're still postpartum, achingly sleep-deprived and dealing with horrendous hormonal imbalances.

The good news is that starting tomorrow we'll have at least a week of healthy body image messages. This coming week is National Eating Disorders Awareness Week, sponsored by the National Eating Disorders Association (NEDA). NEDA is a wonderful organization, not only focused on spreading awareness of eating disorders, but also awareness of society's crazy, all-too-narrow body image expectations. I see ads all the time that are geared towards new moms, telling them they need diets, extreme workout regimens, and even plastic surgery to get their pre-pregnancy bodies back. As if we don't have enough pressure as it is with nighttime feedings, endless laundry and diapers, and all the other hundreds of things we work and cope with every day as moms. On top of it all, we have to look like Barbie, and quick.

Well, thanks to NEDA, we can listen to healthy messages, that remind us that we women come in all different shapes and sizes, that we can actually, truly, be "happy in our genes."

So in honor of next week, here's NEDA's "Get Real Barbie" list that I think we all should read to ourselves and to our daughters:

􀀹 There are two Barbie dolls sold every second in the world.

􀀹 The target market for Barbie doll sales is young girls ages 3 – 12 years of age.

􀀹 A girl usually has her first Barbie by age 3, and collects a total of seven dolls during her childhood.

􀀹 If Barbie were an actual woman, she would be 5’9” tall, have a 39” bust, an 18” waist, 33” hips and a size 3 shoe!

􀀹 Barbie calls this a “full figure” and likes her weight at 110 lbs.

􀀹 At 5’9” tall and weighing 110 lbs, Barbie would have a BMI of 16.24 and fit the weight criteria for anorexia. She likely would not menstruate.

􀀹 If Barbie was a real woman, she’d have to walk on all fours due to her proportions.

􀀹 Slumber Party Barbie was introduced in 1965 and came with a bathroom scale permanently set at 110 lbs with a book entitled “How to Lose Weight” with directions inside stating simply “Don’t eat.”

So, all of you new moms out there ---- think of your body as the vehicle to your dreams. Honor and respect what your body is able to do. You've just created life. What an incredible miracle that is! Cherish your body, eat when you're hungry and for goodness sake, toss out that scale!!!

Crisis Nurseries are an option for women suffering from postpartum depression

2008-01-22T10:58:00.000-08:00

With the big stories in the news lately of women doing harm, and sometimes killing, their children, a Crisis Nursery in CA is trying to reach out to mothers who are suffering from PPD and don't know where to turn for parenting relief. I just read an article about a woman who apparently drowned her 8-day-old daughter and how this particular Crisis Nursery in Sacramento is speaking out about their resources.

I had never thought about crisis nurseries as an option for women who are suffering from PPD. I guess I'd envisioned battered and/or homeless or drug-addicted women as needing that kind of assistance. A temporary safe haven for their kids, to keep them safe. But I can see how a crisis nursery would be just as helpful to a mom who is at the end of her rope, suffering from PPD and without family in town or friends available to help out. I just read about a local crisis nursery here in Arizona, just out of curiosity, and it said that they provide day and night care for babies and children and that they can stay there for up to 30 days. This type of respite care would enable a mom to focus on getting the resources she needs to get herself well.

Unfortunately, there doesn't seem to be a centralized, national number to call to find a local crisis nursery in one's area, but it looks like they're fairly easy to find by state. It sounds like they could be a tremendous resource for women with PPD in need of help, but I just hope that women aren't put off by thinking that crisis nurseries are only for cases of abuse. Hopefully crisis nurseries around the country will follow suit and do what the one in CA is doing: reaching out more to let women with PPD know they're there.

Asthma story still hitting the press 3 days later.....

2008-01-18T15:41:00.000-08:00

So just today the story ran in the Winnepeg Free Press. What's up with that? You'd think this would be old news by now. More disconcerting to me is the fact that this study is still getting attention. Ugh.

Give me a break -- so now they're telling us we cause our kids' asthma!!

2008-01-15T15:06:00.000-08:00

Okay, I wasn't even planning on writing a post today, but I'm just incensed by this article that just this minute hit the internet..... It's what I'd peg as another "meanstream" media story.

So, here it is: according to Canadian researchers who apparently studied 14,000 kids born in 1995, of whom 7% were diagnosed with asthma by the time they reached the age of 7. The researchers focused only on maternal stress/depression as a factor causing the incidence of asthma. According to them, the result of the study shows that kids who have moms that are depressed are 25% more likely to develop asthma.

Now, down towards the end of this article, it does say: "The researchers aren't blaming stressed moms for children's asthma." Yeah, sure they aren't....

Is something wrong here?!?! What about factors that actually have a direct correlation to asthma, ... say, I don't know, like AIR QUALITY?

I swear, as if we moms who've survived postpartum depression don't already have enough to feel guilty over.... now we have to worry about our kids blaming us for their asthma.....

A mom shares her PPD experience with me

2008-01-14T20:31:00.000-08:00

I received an e-mail from a mom named Peggy who shared her PPD experience with me. I was so touched by her story that I asked her if I could share it on my blog, and she said sure. I'm always so grateful when other moms share their stories because it not only helps build our growing PPD Prevention community, but it also helps other women who are suffering realize they're not alone.

Here's Peggy's message:

"Hi, I think you're doing great talking about your experience. I was so emotionally impressed with your site. I have also suffered from PPD after my second child, and I must say it was a nighmare. Five months i was running around like a zombie. I couldnt sleep i was so anxious that when it came to go to bed, i was convinced that i wouldn't sleep. I only sweated thru the night. I dont know why but i worried over every silly thing. In the morning I had no appetite to eat, and i was a frequent visitor to the toilet with diarrhea. I lost ten pounds and had ups/downs every second. I don't have to tell you how terrible this is. I kept running from doctor to nutritionist and I was almost a vitamin cabinet. Until one day i went to a chiropracter and he told me that his wife had the same thing and she went to a physiciatrist. I THOUGHT HE WAS INSANE. Me to a physiciatrist -- I'm not mentally ill. I felt physically ill. I felt like I was having the flu since my baby was born. After all, my supportive husband made me go, and I must say that that day changed my life. When i found out about PPD i was so relieved that it was only this! He put me on zoloft. I was on it for 18 months and I had an easy weaning. Thank god that I'm over with this and I definitely became stronger in nature and confidence. One thing that still bothers me is that I have a phobia of getting pregnant again. My baby is almost 3 years now, I would eventually want another baby. Besides that I still have times that i can't sleep and my anxiety, mood, eating disorder, returns, and it takes me time to bounce back, which makes me happy to see that i can do it on my own, But will this ever fade away? i hate when the down days come. My mind keeps nudging and racing that i'm falling back and maybe i'll need medication again. I feel sick of it. Again thanks for your support and keep up your good work." PEGGY

I wrote Peggy back and let her know how great I think she's doing with handling her "down" times. I imagine that much of that comes just from the natural stress of having kids to raise and all of the daily physical, mental and emotional work that it involves nearly every minute.

I remember all too well the times after I had recovered from PPD when I still would feel occasional feelings of sinking down. They weren't that bad, compared to when I had full-blown depression, and I was always able to "get back up," but it was still troubling and made me nervous and a little scared, just like how Peggy describes. When I had those times, I tried to remember what my psychologist at the time would tell me: to be gentle on myself, not to panic or beat myself up over not feeling good, and to know that I would get through those stressful moments and that that's all they were -- a response to stress.

And, like Peggy, I also had such a fear about a future pregnancy and was terrified when I became pregnant with my fourth child. But I knew what to expect -- I'd already been through the worst, and was careful to educate myself on how to prevent PPD. And it worked! It's amazing and empowering to know that you can actually choose to avoid the PPD hell that you've experienced before.

Anyway, many kudos to Peggy for sharing her story!!! Peggy, you're an incredibly strong woman!

An incredibly strong mom shares her PPD story

2007-12-13T11:52:00.000-08:00

Wow. I just read a couple of recent posts on a blog by a mom who is sharing her postpartum depression story. And wow. What a story and how brutally honest and beautiful her writing is. I admire her so much for diving down to the depths of her PPD suffering and bringing up to the surface the shocking yet very true feelings that so many of us have had but are afraid to admit. Please go read her story.

A postpartum depression interview with an extraordinary high school student

2007-12-08T21:41:00.000-08:00

I was recently contacted by a high school student named Ashley clear across the country who asked if she could interview me for a high school project. She had chosen to write about Postpartum Depression with the hopes of educating others on how devastating and misunderstood it is. Ashley found me when she came upon this blog and I was so thrilled and honored to help her out. Below are her questions to me and my responses during the interview.

What was your initial reaction to finding out you had Postpartum Depression, how did it impact your life?

My initial reaction, as sappy as it sounds, was crying tears of joy. Receiving a diagnosis of Postpartum Depression had a major impact on my life at the time. I had spent three months suffering horribly, some of that time in and out of the hospital, with so much of my stress wrapped up in the fact that I had no idea what was wrong with me. The doctors caring for me had no idea either, so I felt completely isolated and alone. Being diagnosed was incredibly empowering because at last I could say: here’s what’s wrong with me and it’s treatable. There was a name for my agony. That knowledge literally brought up from the darkest place where I was contemplating suicide to one where I felt some hope.

What symptoms of Postpartum Depression did you have to suffer through, and if you had any, what physical changes occurred as well?

My symptoms were largely gastro-intestinal; mainly comprised of stomach pain, vomiting, diarrhea, fainting, dehydration, dizziness, major weight loss, lethargy and nausea. The nausea was far more intense than even the worst morning sickness that I’d ever experienced with any of my pregnancies. The most disturbing symptom was the extreme dizziness. The room would start spinning the moment I lifted my head from my pillow. I would have to literally crawl on the floor to make it to the bathroom. I went from being a very healthy and physically active (former marathon runner) 30-year-old woman to being completely debilitated and unable to function. Even the simplest everyday tasks, such as brushing my teeth, were impossible at times.

What impact did your Postpartum Depression have on your family and friends?

It destroyed my relationship with my parents, who did not understand depression (especially PPD) at all. During my second hospitalization for dehydration, my dad called me on the phone and told me to “get off my butt and start taking care of my babies.” I begged my parents to help me and my husband take care of our babies so that I could get out of the house for doctor’s appointments, but they refused and said it was my choice to have the babies, therefore I must deal with the consequences. When I was finally diagnosed with PPD, I needed some financial assistance in order to see a psychologist who was a PPD expert, and when I asked my parents for a loan they responded similarly. It has been nearly twelve years and I haven’t had a relationship with my parents since. I was so deeply affected by their ignorance of the reality of mood disorders and their lack of compassion that I’ve chosen to keep them out of my life. At the time, I was too ashamed about having PPD to tell any of my friends, so I didn’t share or ask for support from them. I think I feared they would react the same way my parents had.

What treatments did you go through for Postpartum Depression and if there were multiple treatments, which ones do you believe to be the most effective?

Immediately after my diagnosis, my obstetrician put me on an anti-depressant, Prozac, and it started working quickly. In only two weeks I felt nearly like my former self and I was able to take care of my babies and function well around the house. I also immediately began seeing a psychologist who specialized in PPD. Talk therapy helped enormously and I continued seeing her regularly (first once a week and then eventually once every two weeks) for about a year until I felt I was completely recovered. In addition, my psychologist recommended that I start writing in a journal, which I did, and also found very helpful. In fact, I credit that as the official start of what became my career in writing. I had never dreamed of becoming a professional writer, but after journaling and writing extensively about my PPD experience, I found that I loved writing so much that I became a freelance journalist.

In addition to talk therapy and taking Prozac, my psychologist recommended that I take a class of some sort or join a book club, etc, to have an excuse to get out of the house and do something just for me. I signed up for my first yoga class, one evening a week at the time, and that in itself made a major impact on my life. Not only was I getting out of the house by myself, I was doing a wonderfully therapeutic form of exercise that has taught me a great deal about the mind/body connection. I still do yoga regularly and my kids have done yoga since they were small.

Where there times when you would just want to give up because everything just seemed so stressful and overwhelming?

YES. There were many times when I couldn’t raise my head from my pillow and I’d think that I was so worthless that my life wasn’t worth living. I truly believe that if I had gone on much longer without a diagnosis that I wouldn’t be here today.

How do you feel when people assume that Postpartum Depression is just the “baby blues” and that “everyone goes through it, so it’s not a big deal”?

Whenever I hear or read the term “baby blues,” it makes me extremely angry. It's a load of crap. That term was created either by a man, or by a woman who never experienced a perinatal mood disorder. It’s like saying cancer is just a mild discomfort. And PPD is indeed a big deal since women have died from it since the beginning of time. They’re still dying.

Did you ever feel like people would judge you unfairly when they found out you had Postpartum Depression?

Yes, I totally felt like I would be judged since there’s still such a stigma surrounding mental disorders. The reason I began speaking out about my PPD experience is because I got so tired of hearing how women are still suffering every day, being misdiagnosed or left undiagnosed. And their children are suffering, both emotionally and cognitively. I don’t believe we’re any further along in decreasing the incidences of PPD than we were in 1996 when I had it.

Do you feel that after your recovery, you are a changed person or generally the same as you were before you knew you had Postpartum?

I am a completely different person. I feel like I’m more compassionate in general, but especially when it comes to mental disorders. I actually look at my PPD experience as a gift in a way because I’ve learned so much about my body and how to cope better with stress.

A few years after I suffered from PPD, one of my children was diagnosed with both Asperger’s Syndrome and Tourette’s Syndrome. Since I had worked so hard to educate myself on my own mental disorder, it was easier to understand and deal with the challenges that my child faced.

How do you feel about the controversy that erupted between Brooke Shields and Tom Cruise a few years ago?

I’m really glad it happened because it did a great deal to raise awareness of PPD among the general public. (It also demonstrated what an idiot Tom Cruise is and how that particular way of thinking needs to stop.)

Is there anything else you would like to tell the class regarding Postpartum Depression?

The main thing that I would like to express is that PPD is not only treatable, it is preventable as well. Many women don’t realize this, especially if they’ve already suffered from PPD. They assume they’ll have it again, and roughly 30% of women in this category even consider abortion when they find they’re pregnant again, rather than face PPD another time. I write a lot about PPD prevention on my blog and share my story of having a wonderful postpartum with my fourth baby in 2001, several years after my horrible PPD experience. As in most cases, knowledge is power, and I was truly empowered when I became pregnant my fourth (and last) time around. I knew what my PPD symptoms looked like, knew to watch out for them, knew to ask for help, to set up a strong support system of loving family and friends, and most of all, to take care of myself through the pregnancy and birth. For more information and access to some resources that I think are really great, you can always visit my blog or e-mail me.

Ashley, I cannot thank you enough for tackling this important topic and spreading awareness through your work. The more we talk about PPD, the more women and medical professionals will be educated so that one day we can bring an end to this devastating disorder.

Has anyone ever tried online counseling for postpartum depression?

2007-11-15T21:26:00.000-08:00

I've heard of more and more people trying online therapy, but I've never tried it myself. I came upon a site called Tranquil Counseling that specializes in postpartum depression counseling. And it's done online through e-mail and live one-on-one chats. That would be amazingly convenient for new moms. Imagine laying your baby down for a nap and then going into the next room for a PPD therapy session.

Tranquil Counseling is apparently located in Indianapolis, Indiana, but helps people from all over the country. I checked out the fee and it looks really reasonable compared to off-line rates; $95 for a 60-minute chat session and about half that for an e-mail exchange.

I'd be interested to hear of anyone else's experience with online counseling.

Does Postpartum Depression ever go away?

2007-11-01T13:28:00.000-07:00

I was just asked a really good question: how can you tell when your PPD is gone? The mom who asked this question is feeling better, her PPD symptoms have disappeared, and yet .... there is still this persistent fear that PPD might sneak back around and bite her. I can so relate to this, as can probably any woman who has recovered from PPD, because it's so frightening and can be so incredibly devastating. I know when I got pregnant my last time, I was ready to do anything and I mean anything to avoid suffering through PPD again.

When it comes to knowing for sure when you're well past the nightmare days of PPD, I think it just takes time. I remember when I was still in the throes of PPD and had started on an anti-depressant while going to a psychologist, I honestly couldn't even see an end to it. I couldn't imagine ever being well and functioning the way I used to. But gradually, as my PPD symptoms started to disappear and I regained a sense of my old familiar self, my confidence and self esteem started to build. The more time went by, the more activities I started doing with my kids, and the more confident I became. I saw my psychologist for one year before she told me that she felt I was doing great and that I no longer needed talk therapy. This was a huge milestone for me and I think that with her doing that, it kind of gave me permission to tell myself that my PPD was gone forever. That horrible, stomach-churning fear that my symptoms would come back unannounced just disappeared. I was finally well. But, I honestly think that this realization of being well could have happened much sooner than one year out. I just didn't have the confidence yet. Fortunately, my psychologist nudged me in the right direction.

So, I guess long story short, it's important to take each day as it comes, whether you're in the midst of PPD or in recovery from it. The more "good" days you have under your belt, the more confident you'll get and at some point you'll come to the realization that you're well and can put PPD behind you. The realization may come in an ah-ha moment or it may come gradually. But it will happen and you'll go forward knowing that you can do anything.

I've gone back to green....

2007-10-31T23:00:00.000-07:00

I turned my blog pink for the month of October for breast cancer awareness. Even though I've gone back to my original green color, I'm going to make an effort to put breast cancer awareness deeper in my life through personal fundraising efforts and involvement in breast cancer awareness events. It seems like more and more women I know are being confronted with a breast cancer diagnosis and this really blows me away.
My blog may be green, but I'm pink in my heart.

Blogging for Mother's Act!

2007-10-24T13:43:00.000-07:00

Today is a pretty cool day. Women bloggers from around the country are writing today, October 24, to spread awareness of the Mother's Act that is currently before a senate committee. Nearly one million women in the U.S. will experience a postpartum mood disorder this year. And yet only a tiny percentage will actually receive the care they need to get better. The Mother's Act will address this issue by insuring that there will be much-needed screening, education, services and resources for new moms and their babies. If passed, there will be a tremendous impact in the lives of moms and their children -- countless families are now needlessly suffering from PPD and other disorders that are so preventable and treatable. It's a no-brainer. We just need to speak out and make sure the Mother's Act is passed.

The bill is currently with the Health, Education, Labor & Pensions (HELP) Committee of the Senate. If the majority of the HELP Committee members endorse the MOTHERS Act, the bill will move forward for consideration by the Senate. Let's move it forward. Pick up your phone today and call your senator's office. It's that easy to help other women.

For more information and to learn how to contact your senator, go to Postpartum Support International.

PPD Survivor goes pink!

2007-09-30T15:23:00.000-07:00

It's the last day of September and I've changed my blog color to pink! October is breast cancer awareness month and I think this is a tremendous and very important cause to support. For info on breast cancer awareness and fundraising events that are happening around the country during October, check out the Susan G. Komen web site as well as the American Cancer Society's site. The Cancer Research Foundation offers ideas on ways to have your own fundraiser to help fund cancer research.

What to do if you're suffering from PPD but don't have health insurance ... here's one idea

2007-09-26T12:26:00.000-07:00

Ever since I've started blogging about my own postpartum depression experience and also about the amazing resources that are out there for women and their families who are suffering, I often hear from new moms who are looking for help but don't have health insurance. This is such a huge issue, but after doing a little digging, I've been able to find some free resources that are out there.

For one, a wonderful organization called Postpartum Support International offers free phone sessions on an 800 line. These free sessions happen every Wednesday and are hosted by a PPD expert. This is an awesome, free resource that I think would be helpful to so many new mothers out there, as well as to their spouses, family and friends. Please check it out.

Postpartum Support International is now offering free Perinatal Mood Disorder Informational sessions via 800 teleconference line. The sessions are open to women who feel they may be suffering from a pregnancy related mood disorder, as well as to concerned family and friends. Callers will have the opportunity to ask questions and obtain information from PSI healthcare professionals. This new program started Wednesday, May 2, 2007, at 3pm eastern standard time and will continue weekly on Wednesdays, alternating between 3pm and 9pm eastern standard time. The sessions are limited to the first 15 callers.Participants must call 1-800-944-8766 five minutes before the call begins. After the 15th caller joins the call, no other callers may join.This is a tremendous resource!! Check www.postpartum.net for dates, times and facilitators.

To breastfeed or not to breastfeed. That is the question. Don't let the current hospital movement influence your choice!

2007-09-21T23:45:00.000-07:00

I know I've written about this before in a previous post ... about how difficult it was when I decided not to breastfeed my fourth baby (and I don't mean the decision itself was difficult -- it was that the health care providers around me were unbelievably difficult). Well, I'm just glad that I'm not giving birth today because of the self-righteous stance that a slew of hospitals and providers around the country are taking.

What's happening is this: there's a movement involving hospitals in New York, California, Colorado, Massachusetts and Texas to stop giving out free formula samples to new moms. The thinking behind this movement is that because the American Academy of Pediatrics has determined that breastfeeding is best, then new moms should not be exposed to a 6-pack of free formula bottles because, heaven forbid, they will most assuredly become instantly swayed to give up breastfeeding. I mean, who are we as women to actually make the choice on how best to feed our babies?

And so what about the women who end up having to have an unplanned (or planned) C-section which can delay milk production by several days? Or the women who have babies that suffer from severe allergies? Or the women (like me) who choose to take an anti-depressant, that happens to be very dangerous to an infant, in order to be able to function as a mother? I'm sure there are plenty of new moms who are suddenly confronted with a change in plan and have to use formula for one reason or another, and are unprepared ... it is essential for them to have easy and free access to formula.

Whoever had the idea that mothers need to be denied something in order for them to make the "right" choice (according to the mandate of an organization) is absolutely crazy. And, not to mention, obviously a man. This isn't an Orwellian world we live in -- at least not yet. Let's protect our right to choose how we feed our babies.

Postpartum depression risk assessment during pregnancy

2007-09-10T12:10:00.000-07:00

I just love the The Postpartum Stress Center site. One great tool on the site is a PPD risk assessment for women who are pregnant or planning to be pregnant. It's a good way to become educated on various factors that could predispose you to experiencing a postpartum mood disorder. For example, the following are some of the factors listed in the assessment:

- I have had a previous episode of postpartum depression and/or anxiety that was successfully treated with therapy and/or medication.

- I might have experienced symptoms of postpartum depression following previous births, but I never sought professional help.

- I have had one or more pregnancy losses.

- I have a history of depression/anxiety that was not related to childbirth.

- I have lost a child.

- I have been a victim of the following:
Childhood sexual abuse
Childhood physical abuse
Physical assault by someone I know
Physical assault by a stranger
Physical assault during this pregnancy
Sexual assault by someone I know
Sexual assault by a stranger

- There is a family history of depression/anxiety, treated or untreated.

- I have a history of severe PMS.

- I do not have a strong support system to help me if I need it.

- I have a history of drug or alcohol abuse.

- People have told me I'm a perfectionist.

- During the past year, I have experienced an unusual amount of stress (ex: Move, job loss, divorce, loss of loved one)

I find this list so interesting and wish I'd had it back in the day. For example, the perfectionist issue -- who would have thought that being a perfectionist could raise your risk for having PPD? But, I can totally see it and how that overwhelming feeling that you're not doing everything you should be doing for your newborn, the household, other kids who need your attention, etc., etc., is devastating to a perfectionist who is used to having everything all put together perfectly.

And what about a history of severe PMS? That's such a huge and common issue. According to the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists, approximately 40% of women experience PMS on a consistent basis. And nearly 85% of women will experience one or more of the symptoms over the course of their reproductive life. But do these women realize that having PMS may be a factor that puts them at higher risk for PPD?

And of course the support system issue is a biggy and I've written about it before because it's something I've experienced personally -- both the lack of support and having support. For me, not having a strong support system was the overriding factor when I suffered from PPD. I felt like I was screaming out for help but no one was hearing me. It was horrible feeling so utterly alone and it nearly did me in. But with my subsequent pregnancy here in Arizona, when I had an overwhelmingly strong support system in place, my postpartum was wonderful. When pregnant women are busy filling a nursery with furniture, bedding, diapers, and other essentials, what they really need to be doing is filling up their support system with friends and family who are willing to pitch in with meals, household help, supportive phone calls, shopping assistance, birth announcements and more.

I could write all day about the above list. Most importantly, I want to applaud The Postpartum Stress Center for creating its eye-opening PPD Risk Assessment During Pregnancy. I think every pregnant woman should take a look at it. If you're not familiar with The Postpartum Stress Center, it was founded in 1988 by the wonderful Karen Kleiman, MSW, and received Postpartum Support International's Jane Honikman Award in 2003.

Eating your placenta (placentophagy) cures postpartum depression??!?

2007-09-07T22:11:00.000-07:00

Okay, I'm trying to type this post with a straight face. I know this topic has been out there for a long while ... I think I first heard about it a few years ago and repressed the memory of it. It's come back above ground recently through the media and still totally freaks me out. I find it amazing that a woman sued a hospital to get her placenta so she could eat it. And I just visited a discussion thread on mothering.com to see what other moms are saying about the suggestion that eating your placenta cures you of PPD. I'm still freaked out....

So there are women who actually roast their placentas in the oven shortly after they've given birth. They wait till it's dried out, carefully strip away the membranes (are you feeling sick yet?), chop it up into bite-size pieces, pound them into powder and pour the powder into empty capsules to "swallow without being able to taste it." There are other placenta recipes, such as dropping it into a blender with your favorite smoothie mix (don't forget to add extra strawberries to disguise the red color of the blood), or even mixing it with vegetable juice till it tastes like a bloody mary (no pun intended!).

I even came across a site that shows a woman holding her placenta and describing it as looking like a "boneless beef round steak." She does offer other options in lieu of the Silence of the Lambs routine, such as making a "placenta print as a keepsake," or to "use it to fertilize your garden."

I don't know, this is all just a bit too crunchy for me. I can't imagine a "cure" for PPD looking like this. The assertion is that the placenta is filled with hormones that helped sustain the pregnancy, and if the mother ingests it, she will replace the hormones she has lost and avoid suffering from PPD. One question I haven't yet seen addressed is: once a placenta is dried out, would the hormones even still be chemically active/viable?

But nevermind that -- is this the kind of PPD "cure" that women have hoped for? Are we really so desperate to accept something so unbelievably icky??

A comment from the fabulous Katherine Stone of Postpartum Progress!

2007-08-28T21:38:00.000-07:00

Katherine Stone, a fellow PPD blogger who writes the awesome Postpartum Progress blog, has commented on my last post...

"This is a good discussion. There are so many different people women can see, and each has a widely varying amount of experience treating these disorders. It is so important to ask whoever you're seeing how much experience they've had treating women with postpartum mood disorders. I actually prefer people who specialize in these disorders, even though they are few and far between. I also had a bad experience with a psychiatrist who just kept prescribing me more and more medications. It definitely prevented me from getting better, and I suffered longer than I should have."

On her blog, Postpartum Progress, Katherine has a list of links to some of the top hospitals and clinics in the United States that have specialties in and conduct research on women's perinatal mood disorders. She researched this list herself and did a great job, offering a great starting point for those who are searching for a medical professional (or a referral to one) who specializes in PPD and other postpartum mood disorders.

Yay, Katherine! Thanks for sharing your thoughts on my blog and doing such great work to increase awareness of PPD!!!

Are there any psychiatrists out there who actually talk to you?

2007-08-26T15:24:00.000-07:00

Passing As Myself left a good comment on my last post when I was getting to the point of ranting about how hard it is to find a psychiatrist (this was following a previous post where I ranted about how we all need to get our anti-depressants from psychiatrists and not from other doctors who don't specialize in the brain). Here's what Passing As Myself said:

"I also wanted to point out that some psychiatrists can be even worse than getting meds from a PCP (primary care physician). Many are content to over-medicate and focus on the meds and not include any talk therapy. The best mental health care I ever got was from a psychologist. When I told her I thought I needed drugs, she talked over all the options with me and then called my PCP to ask her to write the scrip. Then she and I could focus our energy on cognitive-behavioral therapy. More than one psychiatrist has prescribed drugs to me without bothering to give me options or explain why they thought their pick was best."

I thought this was such a great point that I just had to post on it.... So I started out this thread of thought trying to express my frustration that there are so many women suffering from PPD who get anti-depressants from their gynecologists or internists, etc., when those doctors clearly do not specialize in the area of mental health and have no business trying to determine brain meds. or dosage levels. I've personally gotten myself in big trouble doing this when I took a new SSRI (that seriously screwed me up) that my gynecologist prescribed, then later found out she'd been receiving "gifts" from the pharma rep. that carried this SSRI.

Here, Passing As Myself has brought up the fact that if you're lucky enough to even find a practicing psychiatrist in your area who takes new patients (hopefully without a 3-6 month waiting list) and is actually covered by your insurance, you still may not receive the care that you need. I once went to a psychiatrist who was already writing out my prescription when we were less than 10 minutes into the consultation. He barely even made eye contact with me the entire time I was there, which lasted about 11 minutes. Crazy. I've since had a couple of good experiences with psychiatrists, so I haven't lost faith in them in general. The very best experience I've had has been with a psychiatric nurse practitioner who didn't simply write up a script; she listened and talked with me for an hour each time I went to see her. Isn't this how psychiatrists used to operate? Why is it that now they're just into prescribing meds?

Anyway, what Passing As Myself has found is a fantastic option when you aren't able to find a psychiatrist who will spend the time with you that you need and deserve. I'm so glad she shared her experience!!

So what's up with our access to anti-depressants?

2007-08-23T12:12:00.000-07:00

A woman e-mailed me this morning after reading my last post and said that she's really suffering and needs to see a psychiatrist. She gave birth to her baby after a very traumatic delivery about 6 weeks ago and she's been experiencing some troubling OCD symptoms, like obsessive hand-washing. The problem is that she has no insurance and limited funds, so when she called a psychiatrist that she found in her phone book and was told that it would cost her $225 an hour to see him, she gave up. So I started researching free and low-cost psychiatric resources in her state when this comment appeared on my blog from Moxie Mom:

"I wonder if the inconsistency stems from the availability of seeing a shrink that is affordable since many, many, people have terrible health care. It's much easier for a women to see her PCP (primary care physician) than it might be to see a shrink in that case. Of course, I agree with all of your comments: a shrink would be the best choice. Believe it or not, I have pretty good health care but I see a psychologist and get my drugs from my PCP. All the real psychiatrists wouldn't call me back, even after I left several messages. I called 5 of them. Talk about an eye-opener. Seems to me, all levels of health care providers need to start stepping up their game and thinking outside their box."

Moxie Mom's comment really made me think. I know that in my city, Phoenix, there are very, very few psychiatrists and when you actually find one who happens to be taking new patients, the wait could be as long as 3-6 months. It's ridiculous. There's no way a woman suffering from PPD, not to mention her baby, can wait that long. I could rant about this for hours....

But I still had to figure out how to help this poor woman with no health insurance.... so I'll rant about the general lack of psychiatric care later. I did find a state-funded mental health program in her state that had several psychiatric clinics spread throughout her county. At the clinics, she would be able to have access to either a psychiatrist or a psychiatric nurse practitioner to receive medication if necessary, and also a psychologist for talk therapy. If she qualified all of the services and meds would be free, but even if she didn't qualify financially, she would still receive everything at a 40-60% discount compared to private practices.

That was encouraging and I hope to hear back from her after she finds the support she needs. Moxie Mom, thanks for sharing your thoughts!

I have postpartum depression and need some Zoloft!

2007-08-21T22:12:00.000-07:00

So I was chatting last night with a young woman who has a 9-month-old baby and is suffering from postpartum depression. She asked me where to go to get a "good" anti-depressant. She's been going to her OB who has prescribed Lexapro but so far the Lexapro isn't working for her. Before that, she went to her primary care physician who had her taking Paxil for a while, which also didn't work.

What amazes me here is the fact that neither of these doctors should be prescribing an anti-depressant to this woman who is obviously suffering. I mean, when you need medication for your heart, you go to a heart doctor/cardiologist. When you need medication for your brain, you go to (you guessed it) a brain doctor.

Why are so many women getting their anti-depressants from doctors like gynecologists, obstetricians, internists, etc??? Why are we messing around with our brains??? Would you go to a foot doctor if you're suffering from an ulcer? I think there are so many misconceptions about anti-depressants and it has gotten to where they are way too commonly prescribed -- and by any kind of doctor.

So I suggested that this young mother try to go see a psychiatrist so that she'll have the opportunity to get on the right anti-depressant or mood stabilizer or combination of medications, not to mention the correct dosage level for her. She'd never thought about going to see a psychiatrist or even a psychiatric nurse practitioner. None of her doctors had mentioned this option to her. I just don't understand why doctors who are obviously not specialized in the area of the brain feel that they can prescribe brain meds.

Taking a brain medication is a big deal -- not to be handled lightly.

Shoshana Bennett, Ph.D, author of Postpartum Depression for Dummies, joins our conversation!

2007-08-11T23:36:00.000-07:00

I am so thrilled to have a comment on my blog from Shoshana Bennett, Former President of Postpartum Support International and Founder/Director of Postpartum Assistance for Mothers. How awesome is this!! Shoshana joins the conversation that developed from my posts on the use of anti-depressants while pregnant and/or breastfeeding. Here's what she says:

"As Anne Dunnewold expressed, the judgment needs to go. There is no one “right” way. Each mother is trying to make the best decision for the wellbeing of her baby, and whatever choice feels right for her needs to be respected and supported.

"In order to make the best choice she can for the welfare of her family, it’s also important for the mom to have solid information on the pros and cons when she make this important decision. Here are some facts which many are not aware of. Most medical professionals who have dedicated their careers to studying the safety of antidepressants in pregnancy agree that they have been focusing too heavily on one side of the issue for years. Now, instead of solely focusing on the possible unknown risk to the baby when the mom takes medicine, they are leaning much more on the KNOWN risks to the baby if the mom is NOT treated. Until a few years ago, most of the focus with respect to taking medications while pregnant was on the possibility of harming the baby. Today, since there is much more data gathered on the dangers of depression and anxiety to the developing baby, the focus has shifted to the possible harm from NOT taking medication if the pregnant woman needs it to feel like herself.

"It’s quite clear from the research in the last few years that depression and anxiety in pregnancy can chemically hurt growing babies. For instance, depression in pregnancy can cause low birth weight and preterm delivery, and anxiety may cause harm by constricting the placental blood vessels and raising cortisol. One thing is for sure that everyone agrees upon. If a woman is experiencing depression or anxiety during pregnancy, she and her whole family (big or little, born or not yet born) needs her to receive treatment. Treatment, of course, does not necessarily involve medication, it’s simply the topic of this discussion. On that note, we are learning quite a bit about effective non-pharmaceutical treatments for depression in pregnancy with no side effects except good ones!"

Shoshana S. Bennett, Ph.D. Author, Postpartum Depression For Dummies, http://drshosh.com/

PPD's elusive symptoms

2007-08-10T08:35:00.000-07:00

When I suffered from postpartum depression, I kept insisting that I wasn't depressed. My vision of a depressed woman consisted of lots of weeping, general moping around, hand-wringing, etc. Not a woman who was overcome by nausea 100 times worse than any morning sickness and vomiting violently when not on the toilet with diarrhea. I was a gastrointestinal specialist's fantasy. And after I was sent to a G.I. specialist, I went through the ringer: had an endoscopy, a colonoscopy, tests involving dozens of stool samples (so here I felt like total crap and got to mess with it too!), and many, many other pokes and prods. All the while, I couldn't care for my babies, couldn't even function, much less get out of bed to brush my teeth, and was hospitalized twice for several days at a time for dehydration. Three months after all this G.I. fun, my specialist threw his hands up at me, said there was no intestinal cancer, and that I should go home, get over it, enjoy my babies and have a nice life.

So here's the deal. According to the US Department of Health and Human Services, the symptoms of postpartum depression include:

- feeling restless and irritable
- feeling sad, hopeless and overwhelmed
- crying a lot
- having no energy or motivation
- eating too little or too much
- sleeping too little or too much
- trouble focusing, remembering or making decision
- feeling worthless or guilty
- withdrawal from family and friends
- loss of interest or pleasure in activities
- headaches, chest pains, heart palpitations or hyperventilation

This is a helpful list for a start, but I don't see "violent vomiting" or "intense nausea" or "fainting" or "endless diarrhea" or "dehydration" anywhere on this list. I'm sure there are plenty of other PPD symptoms that are not included as well. I've heard from new mothers who developed obsessive compulsive disorder during postpartum when they'd never experienced it before in their lives. All this leads to major confusion.....how do you even know if you have PPD? How do doctors know what to look for?? SO MANY WOMEN ARE NOT BEING DIAGNOSED!!!

Bottom line is that caregivers and family members need to be in tune to any and all disconcerting changes in a new mother and to be aware that PPD can manifest itself in myriad ways, from gastrointestinal issues to obsessive compulsive disorder, to intrusive thoughts. The key to PPD prevention and successful treatment is awareness and education. But especially awareness.....please help me spread the word.

Pregnant and on meds

2007-08-07T21:39:00.000-07:00

I just love this conversation that's evolved from my post (a couple of posts back) on taking anti-depressants when breastfeeding! I set out simply to give my personal opinion on the risks involved and now feel way more enlightened on this "hot button" topic. In the midst of the mixed messages we get from drug test results and the medical community, we're left to wade our way through the murkiness of this issue while feeling guilty about whichever decision we choose.

I especially love psychologist and nationally-renowned PPD expert Ann Dunnewold's comment that "we need more honesty among women that this decision is hard" and that "women need to stop judging each other. Society as a whole is hard enough on us, setting up perfectionist, unreachable standards for mothers. We need to keep in mind the absolute truth, for the majority of women: that we are all doing the best we can do."

Several women have commented on my previous posts on this topic, openly sharing their experiences. One is now in the sixth month of her pregnancy with her second child. Not only did she suffer from PPD with her first baby, she has also dealt with severe depression since she was 13 years old. She is currently taking Zoloft and plans to stay on the anti-depressant during her postpartum while breastfeeding. She brought up an extremely valid concern that I hadn't touched on .... although we've been talking about the risks that anti-depressants pose to an infant, what about the risks involved when a mom's depression is left untreated? Studies show that the occurrence of untreated postpartum depressive episodes in a mother is linked to poorer cognitive test scores in their children. And way more tragic -- aside from the potential cognitive and development delays and possible psychological damage -- there is also the risk of a child losing a mother to suicide.

I want to thank this very strong and empowered woman for sharing her story -- openly letting us in on her decision that she's made to be on Zoloft while pregnant -- and bringing up this very important point that weighs heavily in this excruciating decision that so many of us have to face head on. I wish her all the best with the rest of her pregnancy and hope she keeps in touch so we can all celebrate with her when she experiences a joyful, calm PPD-free postpartum!

Ann Dunnewold, Ph.D, author of Postpartum Survival Guide, joins our conversation!

2007-08-05T22:51:00.001-07:00

I've had quite the response from my last two posts that hit on the emotionally-charged issue of taking anti-depressants while pregnant and/or breastfeeding. Every comment has been great and I really appreciate the personal stories and thoughts that have been shared.

I was especially thrilled to see a comment today from Ann Dunnewold! Ann is a psychologist and nationally-renowned expert on postpartum depression. Of her several books on the topic, my favorite is "Postpartum Survival Guide." Her latest book, "Even June Cleaver Would Forget the Juice Box," provides solutions to the "mommy madness" that tends to pervade our lives as we feel pressured to aspire to perfect mommyhood.

On that note, her comment is awesome:

"I am so glad you brave women are talking about these issues. We need more honesty among women that this decision is hard--and that pregnancy or postpartum is not always a glowing Hallmark card experience.

"The official professional position is that a comprehensive "risk-benefit analysis" is necessary, because there is no "Right Answer". This means weighing the possible effects on the mother and baby of either choice —medication or doing without. There are documented serious negative effects of not treating depression and anxiety during pregnancy, including low birth weight. Over the twenty years that I have worked with postpartum moms, information has changed as research and drugs continue to evolve. Responsible, caring healthcare providers are usually glad to look at the issues for any individual’s case. If not, get a second opinion.

"For the facts about meds during breastfeeding, one of the key experts is Dr. Thomas Hale, who has a website at http://neonatal.ttuhsc.edu/lact/ and is the author of a great resource, Medications and Mother's Milk. Dr. Hale is VERY reassuring, feeling most meds are safe--but he is addressing breastfeeding, not pregnancy.

"The most important point in the posts here that I want to re-emphasize is that women need to stop judging each other. Society as a whole is hard enough on us, setting up perfectionist, unreachable standards for mothers. We need to keep in mind the absolute truth, for the majority of women: that we are all doing the best we can do. No woman I have ever seen in my office takes medication for fun. Women take them to function.

"We need to support, not criticize, each other's choices—and know that there as many valid choices as there are women in the world. Trust that you have made the best decision for you, given available info at this point in time. Don’t second guess or torment yourself with “what ifs” once you have decided."

Thank you so much, Ann, for taking the time to visit my blog and to share your valuable insight with us. You're the best!!!

More on meds and breastfeeding

2007-08-02T15:11:00.001-07:00

Well, I've been e-mailing with a woman who wasn't at all happy with me after reading my previous blog on anti-depressants and breastfeeding. (She gave me permission to write about our communication on this blog.) She shared with me her experience of suffering from bipolar disorder and being on medication for it since she was a teen. When she and her husband were trying to get pregnant, she went off her meds. But by the end of her first trimester, she was having an absolutely horrible time so her doctor advised her to go back on her medication. She did so and went on to have a symptom-free, wonderful full-term pregnancy. Her baby is now nearly six months old and she's breastfeeding her baby and doing just fine. She feels very good about her decision to remain on medication and knows that she needed to do this in order to function and to be able to take care of her baby. She said she felt like she needed to defend her decision after reading my last post and make it clear that other moms shouldn't feel guilty about the decisions they make.

I absolutely agree with her. I applaud her for handling her illness so incredibly well and being so strong to know her options and then to choose the best one for her and her baby. Taking charge of our own health care is what each of us needs to do. The big stumbling block here, that I was trying to express in my previous post, is knowing our options. Often we're given information by the medical community (via pharmaceutical companies), without realizing we have other options. Or we're given just part of the information, or worse, complete misinformation.

I do feel fortunate that I didn't need to take an anti-depressant while I was pregnant, so I never faced that excruciating choice. I do know plenty of other moms who have and who felt like they wouldn't have made it through their pregnancies without medication. I totally respect and support their decision. I remain skeptical, however, about the safety of taking anti-depressants while pregnant or breastfeeding and think we need to demand more and better testing on these drugs. We shouldn't have to settle for an anti-depressant that is shown to cause birth defects, even if it is only a small percentage. We shouldn't have to settle period, but as women, that's historically what we've had to do when it comes to our health care.

I'm starting to ramble, but I guess what I really want to express here is that I think it's always good to discuss how we all need to respect each other's differences in opinion and different choices. Motherhood is tough enough as it is, but it's certainly way tougher if we don't pull together and support each other.

Just like the mom I've been e-mailing with felt attacked by my statement in my previous post that it's common sense to avoid anti-depressants during pregnancy and breastfeeding, I went through a similar experience when I made my decision not to breastfeed my fourth baby. I had really thought it out and made this decision because I knew it would be in my and my baby's (and my other children's) best interest for me to avoid postpartum depression so that I could be a functioning mother. For me, that meant not breastfeeding so that my hormones would become normalized faster and so that I could immediately go on an anti-depressant and not worry about it being in my breastmilk. It was a good decision for me, but I had a heck of a time expressing that to the nurses on the maternity wing of the hospital where I delivered. Although they didn't come right out and say it, they practically accused me of being a bad mom.

Twice a lactation consultant was sent to my hospital room to try to encourage me to breastfeed. I was given all kinds of "breast is best" cues and whenever I asked for formula for my hungry baby, it took forever for it to be delivered to my room. It was all I could do not to feel guilty for my decision, when I knew deep down, below the crashing hormones, exhaustion and pain from the C-section, that I had made the best decision for me.

These decisions are never easy, are they??

Anti-depressants and breastfeeding

2007-07-26T20:44:00.000-07:00

There have been several new moms visiting this blog who have shared their concern about taking anti-depressants while breastfeeding. There are so many mixed messages on this out there -- doctors saying that it's perfectly fine, that moms need to take care of themselves first in order to take care of their babies; or that there is a risk, but it's so minimal to not really count. Then there are those who say that even a minimal risk is still a risk, so why risk it?

A recent study came out from the New England Journal of Medicine that concluded that women do not increase the risk of birth defects in their babies by taking anti-depressants while pregnant or breastfeeding. And yet it also stated that "drugs such as Celexa, Paxil, Prozac and Zoloft may increase the risk for certain defects, but, even then, the absolute risk is extremely small." AND it also stated that "even if a certain drug increased rates by a factor of four, the risk of having a child affected by the problem would still be less than 1 percent."

Confused??

Bottom line, and what no one seems to be talking about, is the fact that this study was funded by a few pharmaceutical companies, including GlaxoSmithKline, the manufacturer of Paxil.

Hmmmm.... what does that tell you?

In any case, when I was pregnant, I would never have entertained the thought of having even a single glass of wine, much less a drug that hasn't been completely tested in children, let alone infants. I don't know, but it seems like common sense to avoid anti-depressants while pregnant and breastfeeding.

What do you think? I'd love to hear about your own experience with or without medication.

Run or walk 5K to help spread PPD awareness!!

2007-07-07T18:16:00.000-07:00

Get your athletic shoes on .... the 5th annual PPD 5K Run/Walk is coming up on Saturday, September 22 at Hampton Park in Charleston, South Carolina. To register, you can simply click on the link about halfway down the righthand column of this page. If you can't make it out there for the event, please consider sending a donation to this fantastic cause. The event's sponsor, the Ruth Rhoden Craven Foundation for Postpartum Depression Awareness, is dedicated to provide info and support to women suffering from PPD and to serve as a resource to the medical community. To find out more about this wonderful foundation and its truly extraordinary founder, Helena Bradford, go to http://www.ppdsupport.org/.

When you have a subsequent pregnancy

2007-07-02T17:45:00.000-07:00

When I was pregnant with my fourth baby, I was pretty nervous about possibly going through another bout of PPD. I'd had such a horrible crash after my third and I'd heard all of the dismal statistics on how common it is to have a repeat PPD experience. But I was determined to beat it. The difference between my third postpartum and my fourth was knowledge. I was empowered by knowing what to expect, being aware of my PPD symptoms and preventive measures that I could take to avoid them.

So, I made a list of everything I needed to have in place so that I could experience the kind of postpartum that every mom envisions -- you know, where you're glowing and healthy, constantly cooing over your baby and relaxing pristinely in your designer maternity loungewear and talking to your friends about how to lose those extra ten pounds.

Okay, so maybe no postpartum is close to that vision, but still, it is possible to have a relatively peaceful and happy postpartum, even with your fourth baby, and even when you've previous suffered from PPD, because I did it.

The key to my last, successful postpartum was having a strong support system in place. Since our extended family is so spread out geographically and I didn't have the luxury of having relatives to lean on, I brought in a postpartum doula to help me for three weeks after our baby was born. Doula is a Greek word and means "woman who serves." A postpartum doula can help in so many ways, basically being a post-birth helper. My doula helped with the baby at night, watched over my C-section incision as it healed, helped identify any symptoms of PPD, handled the laundry, cooking, watched the baby when I needed to spend time with my older children, but most importantly, she listened to me and helped me gradually get back on my feet. She and I were a team and that support was priceless. She stressed that I need to take of myself and recover so that I could take care of my new baby and the rest of my family. Paying for a postpartum doula was the best money that my husband and I have ever spent.

One of my dreams for all new moms in the future is that they all can have the choice of having a postpartum doula.

If you're looking for a doula in your area, feel free to e-mail me and I'll help you find out your options; kdavispark@gmail.com.

What happens when you don't get help

2007-06-23T22:15:00.000-07:00

For the last week my mom has been in a locked-down psychiatric ward located in a major hospital. I was stunned when I got the news because long ago I completely gave up on the possibility that she would seek or receive help. At 66, my mom has lived with bipolar disorder, perhaps OCD and other mental issues for her entire life. However, she has never been diagnosed. Somehow, by some miracle, she has managed to compensate, traveling through life while sliding up and down her manic roller coaster.

Now, she is emaciated, down in the darkest depths of a crash, and unable to function. She must weigh about 90 pounds. Tears stream down her face and neck. Her sentences are loose, jagged. She says she's confused. She has officially been diagnosed with bipolar disorder (at last!), schizophrenia and paranoia. She is on 5 different medications.

When I spoke to her psychiatrist for the first time this week, I found my voice. It rumbled up from a terrified little girl who walked on egg shells and hid in her bedroom. Give me the podium please. Finally, I am heard! The psychiatrist very patiently listened as I recounted bits and pieces of my life as my mom's daughter. My stories confirmed her diagnosis.

On the one hand, I'm so relieved that my mom is getting help. On the other, I'm beyond frustrated that it took till she was 66 years old to get there. I'm told it's never too late, but after all the sick programming that her brain has undergone, I just don't know. I guess I can only hope. All I ever wanted as a child was a healthy, stable mom.

Growing up, I thought my mom was "crazy." I couldn't understand why people didn't see the person she really was. In retrospect, I can see how well she hid her mental illness behind a wall of denial, taking great pains to reveal it only to my brother and to me. My dad would come home from work each day and suddenly Mom morphed into the perfect mother and wife. When my brother was killed in a car accident at the age of 15, a part of me was actually envious of him -- he got out. I wanted so badly to follow him. Instead, just months after his death, I went away to the college on my acceptance list that was geographically the farthest away from home. I still have a hard time going back to my home town, even at the age of 41, because images of the abuse from my childhood come rushing back.

My mom may have had PPD as well, although I really don't know. What I do know is that she was a mom with a severe mental illness who never got help. I'm sure there are women who suffer from PPD and other mental disorders who never recover for whatever reason. It's their kids who end up suffering -- they're the ones left to pick up the pieces.

Does PPD end?

2007-05-28T17:14:00.000-07:00

I was just reading some blogs written by women who are suffering from PPD and one of them asked if PPD ever goes away. Just that one statement brought a rush of memories. I remember that feeling so well -- like you're in this tunnel that keeps getting smaller and darker, with no light in sight. When I was in the throes of PPD, I couldn't even remember what it was like to feel good. I couldn't remember what "normal" was. And I couldn't imagine being that way ever again.

But PPD does end. You do reach light and leave the tunnel. Some women crawl out of the tunnel on their own. Others are lifted up and carried out by their family or friends. But it does end.

In my situation, it was a little of both. I crawled and at the same time leaned on those around me who offered their unconditional love and support. The thing that began to shatter the darkness was knowledge. I was so horribly ill and yet had no idea what was wrong with me. Beginning on the day I came home from the hospital with my beautiful baby daughter, my world started disintegrating. I was hit with intense nausea, worse than any morning sickness ever was. I experienced seemingly endless vomiting and diarrhea and quickly lost my "baby" fat and any reserves I had. I was dizzy the second I tried to lift my head off my pillow. When I did make it out of bed, I often fainted. I gave up breastfeeding my daughter after a week because every time I brought her to my breast, I had to run for the toilet. By the second week I was in complete dispair. Not only did I have my newborn daughter to care for, I also had a 13-month-old son! I was an instant and utter failure, not being able to even get out of bed.

My obstetrician was on maternity leave, so the doctor filling in for her sent me to a gastroenterologist since my symptoms were mainly G.I.-related. This particular doctor was supposedly the best G.I. specialist in Dallas. He checked me over thoroughly (colonoscopy, endoscopy, etc., etc.) for cancer ---- countless tests and two 3-day hospitalizations later, he was done with me. He could find nothing wrong with me and literally threw his hands up and shrugged at me.

By this time, my daughter was 3 months old. I was unable to be a mom, a wife, much less a healthy person. I couldn't drive anywhere. I couldn't keep food down. I couldn't do anything but lay in bed. I wanted to die.

During my last hospital stay, a nurse quietly suggested that I read a book called "Postpartum Survival Guide" by Anne Dunnewold. I didn't know much at all about PPD and was stunned to think that I might have it. I didn't realize I was depressed.

My parents had responded to my situation by cutting me off -- they chose a "tough love" stance because they thought being sick was all my choice.... that I was lazy or simply unwilling to function as a mom. Even though they told relatives not to help me, an aunt wasn't willing to let me suffer without help. I told her about the book recommended by the nurse and she agreed that PPD could be a possibility. I read every page of the book and saw my story in its pages. I couldn't believe it. My aunt encouraged me to get into therapy and offered to help me with child care so that I could get out of the house. I called the book's author, Anne Dunnewold, a psychologist who happened to have an office in Dallas. Although she was completely booked six months out, when she heard my story she agreed to see me within the week. That meeting changed my life. Anne not only suggested medication to help me get out of the tunnel, she also suggested yoga. I started taking Prozac, signed up for a weekly yoga class, and remained in therapy for a year, although my PPD symptoms magically disappeared within a couple of weeks of seeing Anne that first time.

It was the knowledge of PPD that empowered me. I finally had a name for what was wrong with me. At that point I knew my life wasn't over. It was the support of my aunt that helped me get to therapy. It was the combination of therapy, medication and yoga that saved my life.

For anyone who is suffering from PPD, I promise you that you can get better. Don't lose hope. You will get your life back. I did, and not only that, I had a subsequent pregnancy and never experienced PPD again. Knowledge is everything ---- PPD is absolutely preventable.

FREE PPD support phone sessions!

2007-05-20T21:48:00.000-07:00

PSI offers FREE sessions via 800 line every Wednesday!

This is a wonderful, free resource that I think would be helpful to so many new mothers out there, as well as their spouses, family and friends. Please check it out.

Postpartum Support International is now offering free Perinatal Mood Disorder Informational sessions via 800 teleconference line. The sessions are open to women who feel they may be suffering from a pregnancy related mood disorder, as well as to concerned family and friends. Callers will have the opportunity to ask questions and obtain information from PSI healthcare professionals. This new program started Wednesday, May 2, 2007, at 3pm eastern standard time and will continue weekly on Wednesdays, alternating between 3pm and 9pm eastern standard time. The sessions are limited to the first 15 callers.

Participants must call 1-800-944-8766 five minutes before the call begins. After the 15th caller joins the call, no other callers may join.

This is a tremendous resource!! Check www.postpartum.net for dates, times and facilitators.

woman overcomes PPP -- what about those who don't?

2007-05-18T15:01:00.000-07:00

I was just reading an article in Mothering magazine about a woman who overcame PPP (postpartum psychosis). Her story was very enlightening, but scary to read about how much she lost it at times. It was stunning to see the photos of her, ranging from the "before," while she was in the midst of suffering/ravaged by PPP to later when she was recovered, happy and glowing. I suppose I should have felt glad that her story ended with a happy ending; that she received the help she needed, recovered, and has moved on and now has two extremely cute kids aged 2 and 4. But, honestly, by the end of the article I just felt very, very sad. Even as I looked at her blissful family "after" photos, I felt haunted by the unknown faces of all those mothers who didn't make it like she did. All those women who weren't surrounded by a loving, supportive family and/or friends who could spot the danger signs and seek help. Because if you don't have some kind of support system in place before you have a baby -- if you don't have anyone to advocate for you and help you get help, you're pretty much doomed. It's great that there's this well-written article that is out there spreading awareness of PPP by telling the story of one survivor. But what about Andrea Yates and all the other countless women and babies who don't survive PPP? I wonder if we'll ever get to the point where no one has to suffer from this insidious, monstrous disorder.

PPD is preventable -- spread the word

2007-05-13T22:02:00.000-07:00

Even though it's been eleven years since I battled postpartum depression, at times I still feel like I carry its remnants around with me. And sometimes I wonder if my daughter does too. Maybe deep down, on some subconscious level, a part of her remembers the beginning of her life when I wasn't there for her. I wonder if she would be at all different if my postpartum had been different. One thing I do know is that I will do everything I can to ensure that neither of my daughters go through that insidious kind of depression. Because it is completely preventable. That's the tragedy of it -- with something like 40% (and I suspect that percentage is way low) of new mother's experiencing postpartum depression, the reality is that they didn't even need to suffer from it in the first place. That's enough to make one totally depressed.